hope is the thing with feathers

My son Zach is visiting until Saturday and he's such a joy. Wild sense of humor and loving and thoughtful. I can't explain how much I love this kid. I wish he was still a kid but watching him navigate adulthood is interesting, too.

I'm back to writing after about a 2 week dry spell. THAT is good, too.

First thing this morning, my ex called to say he's still sick and can't bring Zach.

So I was all sad about not seeing my son for his holiday break.

Now, it looks like my ex is going to bring him, but on Monday, and he's going to drive the whole way here BUT I have to pay for his gas AND a hotel for him to stay in. Because the drive is so long. I can't really afford it, but it's the only way to see my son.

My PayPal address is anthony.melissa AT rocketmail DOT com. I don't expect your help, but I do need a bit now. So if you can help and want to, please do.

https://ko-fi.com/greenie

I'm doing pretty well. The medications I'm on have been good. I'm finally scheduled to see someone about my back.

DJ still isn't talking to me, but he graduated on Sunday. I was able to watch via live feed. He's signed up to go into the Air Force for 6 years. They want him for NASA or intelligence, they told him. I don't know if we can trust them, but I guess we'll see.

I miss him a lot.

My relationship with Zachary is really good though. We talk all the time, text and Facetime, and I try to support him no matter what his current passion is. It was drawing for awhile, which I could really get behind, but now he seems to be leaning more toward... gardening? I don't even know.

Meg was falling down a lot until we got to the doctor and he figured out it was vertigo from allergies. We got her on a new antihistamine and she's stopped falling.

As for me, other than the YAY MEDS working, I've been writing a lot. Unfortunately, everything I write is super long so I'm not actually posting much.

I probably left a lot out, so if you have a question just ask. I'd love some interaction.

I've got almost enough to pay for my meds + food until the end of the month. Thank you for helping me out, I appreciate it so much. I have been super careful with my Percocet but now I'm out and there's a storm coming so I huuuurt! :( But I'm going to the doctor tomorrow and should get my prescriptions written - I just need a bit more to fill them. I am guessing I need about $50-$75 more and I can pay for everything.

If you can help, it would be great. my paypal is anthony.melissa (at) rocketmail (dot) com.

My youngest son has been here since Saturday now. It is so great to spend time with him. I don't think I ever told you guys about what happened during the winter holidays with DJ. I tried to write & post about it a couple of times, but I couldn't really get through it all, even in writing and taking breaks and stuff. But anyway, DJ isn't here and we're not really talking to each other, mostly because he's taken to being the Worst Teenager Ever, or fulfilling every single stereotype of hateful teenagers. It's painful, but at least Zach doesn't hate me... yet. :\