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Cycle of Souls 3/3
CYCLE OF SOULS: MASTER POST (warnings, etc.)
*
Present Day
“Are you coming to my show tonight?” Frank asks.
Gerard would rather stay in and paint or read comic books, but Frank is so excited about playing in a 'real live band' that he can't possibly say no to his adopted childe. “Okay.”
Frank lights up like a Christmas tree. “It's gonna be fucking awesome.”
Gerard smiles at the modern way Frank talks now. He should be used to it, but sometimes he hears echoes of Frank's accent – now thoroughly American – and marvels. His own accent has softened as well; traveling and living in America for fifty years will do that.
“What time do we have to be there?” Gerard asks.
“We're leaving now,” Frank says. “Hurry up and get dressed.”
Dressing in the twenty-first century is so much easier. All Gerard has to do is slip on a pair of jeans, grab a tee-shirt and jacket, and lace up his boots. Frank watches him, impatience emanating from him thickly.
“All right, all right, I'm ready,” Gerard says, smiling at him.
They run hand in hand to the club. It's always fun to run with Frank, who loves to move and exert his power. The stretch their legs and Frank runs as fast as he can, and Gerard matches his pace.
The club is small and crowded, and Gerard slips off to skulk in the shadows. It's his thing, his vampire thing. He can watch Frank just as well from the wall as he can from up close. He has preternatural sight and hearing, after all.
He watches the dancers, vaguely aware of the hunger he feels. He should feed while he's here. He likes watching the kids who come to Frank's shows. They move with reckless abandon, smelling like salt and sex. Their heartbeats pound, and Gerard can hear them above the music. He knows Frank can, too, that their beating hearts move him.
Frank flails on the stage, playing his heart out. Gerard is so proud of him for finding something he loves to do.
Gerard slips through the crowd when he finds his target. She's got black hair and black eyes, pale skin like a vampire herself. Gerard touches her mind as he touches her arm, then pulls her back along the wall.
She arches against him in pleasure when he bites down. He can hear her soft gasp and low moan. He slips his thigh between her legs so she has something to move against if she wants.
He feels eyes on him. Not Frank's, but someone else's. Someone human. He reaches out, feeling with his mind, still drinking from the club girl. His intention is to wipe a memory, but the mind he finds is painfully familiar.
Gerard licks the girl's neck healed and turns his head. There, staring at him, are eyes he would recognize anywhere.
Michael.
On stage, Frank misses a chord and whips around towards Gerard and Michael. The rest of the band messes up and stops playing. The entire club complains.
Still, Gerard stares at Michael.
His hair is different, his cheekbones higher, his eyes lighter than the brown Gerard remembers. His clothes are tight and thin, showing off more of his body than Gerard remembers ever seeing. No, that's not right. His mind flashes to images of Mihaitus, swimming naked in a pond with him. He can feel his body beneath him and over him, and he has to close his eyes.
When he opens them again, Michael is gone.
Frank tells the crowd they're taking a break and joins Gerard. “I heard right?”
Gerard looks around frantically. “He was here. I just saw him, and then he disappeared.”
“Okay, okay. We'll find him,” Frank says, trying to calm him. But Gerard can't calm down; he just saw his brother for the first time in centuries.
Gerard sends a picture of Michael to Frank's mind. Frank nods and goes one way while Gerard goes the other. They'll find him.
Michael isn't in the club. They go outside and look around, but still find no sign of him.
“He saw me feed,” Gerard says. “It must have scared him.”
But Michael hadn't looked scared. His face had been unreadable – blank. The only thing Gerard saw any emotion in was his eyes, and even those were hard to read.
A bus rolls by, and Gerard curses. Michael could be miles away by now if he had a car. They'll never find him. Not unless he comes back to the club.
“We'll find him,” Frank says again, wrapping an arm around Gerard's waist. Gerard leans on him and closes his eyes.
“We have to,” Gerard says. “He's... he's everything.”
“I know,” Frank says.
“Did you recognize him?” Gerard asks. “Have you seen him before?”
“No,” Frank says. “I'm sorry.”
“Fuck,” Gerard swears quietly. Then he punches the alley wall. His fist cracks through the brick and mortar, and he feels his bones crunch.
“Don't do that,” Frank says, grabbing his hand. Even as he does, Gerard feels the bones knitting back into place. It hurts but he doesn't care. Frank pulls him close, hugging him tightly.
“At least I know...” Gerard begins to say. He knows his general vicinity – a medium-sized town in Jersey. He knows what he looks like. He knows, he finally knows, that Michael lives.
*
Gerard stalks the club every night after he sees Michael. He leans back against the wall, scanning the crowd, watching everyone who goes in or out.
When he's not at the club, he paints. He paints furiously, trying to capture Michael's soul on canvas. The paintings are a mixture of old and new Michael; on some of the canvases he wears a toga, on some he wears linen shirts, hose, and breeches.
And then there are the more modern paintings, where Michael is wearing jeans and a band shirt. Gerard has to work hard on these, getting them just right. He only saw him for a moment, just a glimpse, so he can't quite get it.
He loses sleep, dreaming restlessly during the day and waking hours before Frank to paint and pace.
“Maybe you should check some of the other clubs,” Frank says one night.
“No,” Gerard says. “He'll come back to this one.”
“Do you think he'll be drawn to you?” Frank asks. “Do you think he'll remember?”
“I don't know,” Gerard murmurs. But how could Michael not be drawn to him? Gerard's soul cries out for Michael's. Surely he feels the same.
“Why don't you take a picture of one of your paintings and show it around?” Frank suggests. “Maybe someone knows him.”
Gerard frowns at his latest creation. Michael's jeans are faded and slung low on his hips, and Gerard can see the hint of skin right below the hem of his shirt. In a different age, it would be obscene. Now, the sight makes Gerard's throat tighten.
“That one will work,” Frank says, and whips out his phone to take a picture. “I'll ask people, too. If he's a regular on the scene, we'll find him.”
“We'll find him no matter what,” Gerard murmurs, taking a picture of his own.
“He looks young. Probably still in high school,” Frank says.
“You look young yourself,” Gerard says with a smile.
Frank makes a face and gives Gerard a hug. “I'll ask everyone I see if they know him.”
Gerard hugs back fiercely. “Good luck.”
“You too,” Frank whispers.
*
The tiny club is having another all-ages night, which gives Gerard hope. The band that plays is good. They rile the crowd and get it jumping.
“Have you seen my brother?” Gerard asks again and again, showing the picture around.
There are a couple of nods, but no one knows anything for certain. Gerard searches their minds for a name, a place, anything.
Mikey, the bartender knows. Mikey Way.
Gerard's breath catches in his throat. They have the same surname. Perhaps, far back, they are related. If Michael is a descendant of the Ways who left England in Gerard's time, that would make them cousins, of a sort.
But Michael will always be Gerard's baby brother, of this he is sure.
It goes faster after that. He has a name. “Do you know my brother? Michael... Mikey Way?”
The younger the patrons in the club, he finds, the more likely they are to have met Michael in the past. One girl says, “Mikey, sure. He's in my Latin class.”
Gerard feels excitement well up in him. “Do you know where he lives?”
The girl shrugs. “Never asked. I've seen him at Dante's a lot, though.”
Dante's is another club. All this time, Gerard should have been searching somewhere else. But this is a good lead.
“Where do you go to school?” he asks, compelling her to answer truthfully.
“Belleville High,” she answers easily.
“Thank you,” Gerard murmurs, and thralls her just enough that she'll follow him outside. He feeds from her quickly, eager to find Michael.
He heads to Dante's. Now that he's fed, he can use the rest of the night to hunt for his brother.
Dante's is an all-ages club, filled with high school kids dressed in tight clothes. It only takes one sweep of the club to find that Michael isn't there. So Gerard begins to ask around, and finds that his brother was there earlier, but went home. No one knows exactly where he lives.
“Hey, I hear you're looking for Mikey,” someone says, tapping Gerard on the back. Gerard turns around and sees a girl of about sixteen. She has dark eye makeup and long black hair.
“Yes,” Gerard says. “Do you know where he lives?”
The girl narrows her eyes at him suspiciously. “Who wants to know?”
Gerard smiles and presses on her mind. “I'm his brother.”
She shakes her head as if to clear it. “Mikey's an only child,” she says hesitantly.
“We've been apart for some time,” Gerard says. In her mind, he sees an old but well-kept brick house on the edge of town. “Thank you.”
She rolls her eyes. “Don't you want to know more?”
Gerard smiles. “I don't need any more. You've been very helpful.”
He leaves her standing there confused.
*
The house is easy to find, and Gerard gets there before Michael does. He watches from the shadows as Michael parks and gets out of his car. He touches his mind and Michael looks up towards where Gerard is hiding.
“Hello?” Michael calls. His voice is even, unafraid. Gerard's heart turns over at the sound.
Michael takes a few steps forward, then shakes his head and mutters something under his breath. He walks back towards the house and goes inside.
Gerard crouches in the bushes beside the house and looks inside. Michael's mother is there waiting up for him, and she smiles when she sees him. He gives her a kiss on the cheek and then opens the refrigerator. Gerard watches him, the easy slump of his shoulders and the graceful movement of his limbs. It's painfully familiar. Mother always scolded Michael for slouching, but he did it anyway. The sight of it now is almost too great for Gerard to bear. But still, he watches, memorizing the lines of Michael's new body.
He's taller now, possibly taller than Gerard himself. His hair is darker, not the pale blond of Michael's childhood. His eyes are lighter, he noticed before. Hazel now instead of brown. Not quite as light as Frank's, but close.
Gerard watches as Michael goes upstairs. His mother follows, presumably to her own bedroom.
Gerard waits.
The house is quiet, but he can hear their heartbeats and their small sighs as they sleep. He finds a key under a flower pot by the back door and lets himself in. Quietly, he pads upstairs. He follows the scent of teenaged boy to a half-closed door.
He feels like a voyeur as he watches Michael sleep. He touches his mind, sees his dreams. He closes his eyes and slips in, unseen.
But he sees himself. Michael has been dreaming of him and that night at the club. In his waking hours, Gerard sees, Michael has almost convinced himself that he imagined it. But here in his dreams, he relives the moment.
There is Gerard, leaning over the girl. He can't see his face, only the back of his head. Michael – no, he calls himself Mikey in his mind – watches with interest. Then Gerard turns around and-
Fangs. Blood. Red eyes. But Mikey isn't frightened by the sight. Why isn't he scared? Gerard moves through Mikey's mind and sees that he's trapped in the moment, unable to move under Gerard's gaze. There's something familiar there, something Mikey feels deep in his bones. Or maybe his veins.
The scene shifts, and Gerard watches Mikey's imagination take flight. He is laid bare beneath Gerard, his neck exposed. Gerard holds him down and lunges for his throat.
Back in his bedroom, Mikey stirs and slides a hand beneath the covers. Gerard goes very still as Mikey begins to stroke himself in his sleep. He tentatively reaches out with his mind, feeling Mikey's need. He swallows hard as the scent of lust fills the small room.
Mikey moans in his sleep, stroking faster. In his dream, Gerard feeds from him, biting down harder and rocking against him.
Mikey orgasms, and the scent of his come overwhelms Gerard. He feels sick for watching, ashamed and excited at the same time. This is his brother.
But Mikey has also been his lover. In another life, they were even closer than Gerard can remember of this lifetime, twins who knew each other's greatest fears and desires. Perhaps they were together in other lifetimes as well.
He longs to taste Mikey's blood and remember.
Mikey rolls onto his side and falls into a deeper sleep. Gerard moves closer, smooth and soundless. He leans down and presses a kiss to Mikey's forehead, then breathes in the scent of his hair.
He smells like sunshine after a storm. Like hope.
*
“I found him,” Gerard says to Frank. The dawn is approaching, else he would still be watching over Mikey.
Frank touches Gerard's mind and reaches for memories. Gerard gives them up easily, used to sharing everything with Frank.
“He's not your brother in this lifetime,” Frank reminds him gently. “You have to … I don't know, woo him.”
Gerard laughs. “I don't know how to woo someone.”
“You'd better learn, and stop being a creepy creepster who breaks into houses and watches underaged boys masturbate,” Frank says.
Gerard sobers. “Don't say it like that, it was... an accident. I didn't mean to see that.”
“And yet you didn't leave when you saw what was going on,” Frank says. He wraps his arms around Gerard's waist and presses against him. “Horny?”
“You know I am,” Gerard says.
“Then do me,” Frank says with a waggle of his eyebrows.
Gerard pulls at Frank's shirt and lifts it up over his head, exposing smooth, tattooed skin. He presses him to the bed and unzips his jeans. Frank lifts his hips and lets Gerard slide them down his legs. Frank isn't wearing any underwear.
“How do you want me?” Frank asks.
“I want to suck you off,” Gerard says, “and then I'm going to fuck you.”
Frank beams at him. “You always have the best ideas.”
Gerard strips down until he's bare, then climbs between Frank's legs. He licks Frank's length, teasing and light, and laughs when Frank complains. Gerard swallows him down suddenly, making Frank arch up off the bed. He sucks voraciously, jacking him with his hand as he does.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Gerard,” Frank gasps, slipping a hand into his hair.
Gerard touches his mind and sends a burst of amusement along the connection. Frank flips him off and thrusts into his mouth.
Frank continues thrusting, fucking Gerard's mouth until he comes, gasping and pulling Gerard's hair. He's always extra sensitive after he comes, and Gerard touches him gently, rolling him onto his stomach.
He fucks him smoothly, hard enough to break a human but just right for a vampire. Frank's hands clench in the sheets and he moans, pushing back on Gerard's cock.
Gerard is thinking of nothing but Frank when he comes, although afterward his mind wanders back to Mikey.
“How do I woo him?” he asks. “I've never dated anyone before, I have no idea how to do it.”
“You should try talking to him,” Frank says sleepily. “Find out what you have in common.”
“Besides our past lives?” Gerard asks sardonically.
“You should leave out that part,” Frank says. “And the part where you're a bloodsucking creature of the night.”
“I think he's already figured that much out,” Gerard says.
“Gee, go to sleep,” Frank says, closing his eyes. “You have eternity to figure this shit out.”
“He's human. I don't have that long,” Gerard says testily.
“Oh c'mon, lighten up,” Frank says. He pillows his head on Gerard's chest and smacks his shoulder. “Think about it tomorrow night.”
Gerard growls playfully and nuzzles Frank's hair. “All right. I'll rest.”
“Not like you have a choice,” Frank yawns.
The sun comes up and the force of it pulls Gerard down into sleep.
*
Gerard follows Michael from his house to Dante's. It's Friday night, and Gerard has waited almost a week to see him again. He's been overly patient, he thinks. It's time for them to meet properly.
Michael goes into the club and Gerard follows at a distance. Gerard touches his mind lightly as he meets with his friends.
He stiffens and looks around. Somehow, he's felt Gerard's mental intrusion. He doesn't know where it comes from, though.
One of Michael's friends looks at Gerard and frowns, then leans in close to Michael and whispers something.
Michael freezes and turns around, looking straight at Gerard. Gerard nods and his brother's face pales. No, not his brother. This isn't Michael, not exactly.
Come here, Mikey, Gerard sends gently, leaning against the fall wall of the club. It's shadowed here and relatively quiet.
Mikey shakes his head and looks down, then looks up again, unable to keep his eyes from Gerard. Mikey whispers something to a friend, still not looking away, and begins to walk closer.
His entire body is tense, his instincts screaming Danger! in his mind. But Mikey isn't a coward. Against his fear, he walks on. He comes closer, until Gerard could just reach out and touch him. He doesn't though, not yet. Mikey is spooked enough already.
Mikey stops in front of him, looking into his eyes. Gerard nods again.
“I'm Gerard,” he says.
Mikey swallows and licks his bottom lip nervously. “You're a vampire,” he says, his voice soft but even. If Gerard wasn't touching his mind, he would have thought him calm.
Gerard smiles and leans back more, giving the impression of total relaxation. He wants Mikey to let down his guard, but he knows it won't be that easy.
“I am,” Gerard says. “But it's a secret.” On the small stage, a band starts playing. Gerard smiles and holds out his hand to Mikey. “Dance?”
Mikey shakes his head no even as he reaches out to take Gerard's hand. His eyes are narrow and distrustful, but Gerard curls his fingers around his and pulls him onto the dance floor.
Gerard knows how to dance, he just doesn't do it very often anymore. But he's seen Frank move enough to know just how to do it. He places his hands at Mikey's hips – gently, not as possessively as he'd like – and pulls him close.
They move together to the music, and Gerard once again touches Mikey's mind. Mikey's breath comes sharp and he thinks, What is he doing to my head?
Relax, Gerard sends. Just dance.
Mikey shakes his head as if to dislodge Gerard's mind. “Don't do that,” he says softly. “It creeps me out.”
“Talk to you mind to mind?” Gerard asks.
“Don't do anything with my mind,” Mikey says. “I don't like thinking there's more than me in my head.”
Gerard leans forward and murmurs in his ear. “I'd never hurt you.”
“Forgive me if I don't believe you,” Mikey says back in a monotone. Then, “What do you want with me?”
Gerard hesitates to answer. He can't give Mikey the truth, but he answers as best he can. “I like you, Mikey Way.”
“You don't even know me,” Mikey says.
“What I know is good,” Gerard says. “And I'd like to get to know you better.”
Mikey bites his lip and nods slowly. “Just don't kill me, okay?”
Gerard smiles and pulls Mikey closer against him. He can feel the beat of his heart in his chest and smell his shampoo under his sweat. “I won't,” he promises.
Mikey mutters, “A fucking vampire,” under his breath, but doesn't pull away. He lets Gerard dance close to him, and he begins to move with the music again.
When the band's set ends, Gerard buys Mikey a cold soda and offers to walk him home.
“I drove,” Mikey says. “And I doubt my mom would want me bringing home an older man. She's not that understanding.”
“What time do you have to be home?” Gerard asks. Mikey looks at his watch and says, “In an hour.”
“Oh. Maybe tomorrow night you could come to my place. You could meet Frank,” Gerard says, excited at the idea.
“Who's Frank?” Mikey asks.
Gerard hesitates. How to describe his relationship to Frank to someone who doesn't understand vampire relationships? He settles with, “Frank's my childe.”
“Your childe. You mean you made him a vampire?” Mikey asks.
Gerard nods.
“Are you... together?” Mikey asks.
“We've been together for almost two hundred years,” Gerard says.
Mikey pulls away a little and studies Gerard's face. “That's not what I meant.”
“It's hard to explain,” Gerard says. “He's family.”
“And more,” Mikey says. “Don't try to lie to me. What do you want me for?”
“Pardon?” Gerard says.
Mikey snorts. “If you have Frank already, what do you want me for? Or are you just greedy?”
“You want me, too,” Gerard murmurs.
“Stay out of my mind,” Mikey says.
“Come have dinner with us tomorrow night. I'll pick you up,” Gerard says.
“I can drive,” Mikey answers. “Give me your address.”
Gerard does. Mikey says he'll arrive when the sun goes down.
“I still don't know what you want with me, but I'm curious enough to go along with it,” Mikey says.
“How old are you?” Gerard asks.
“Seventeen,” Mikey says. “Why? Too young for you?”
It's old enough to die, older than Michael was when the plague took him. Gerard has a sudden fear that something will happen to Mikey. He shakes his head and looks away. “Stay safe, okay?”
Mikey gives him a strange look, but nods slowly. Music from the DJ blares through the speakers.
They dance silently after that, moving together, pressed against one another, and Gerard can sense Mikey's arousal as a slow burning fire. It would be so easy to stoke it, to make Mikey burn for him, but Gerard knows he should go slowly else he will chase Mikey away. He doesn't want to scare him.
After the dance, Gerard pulls away, dragging his eyes from Mikey's long neck. “You have to go.”
Mikey nods and then impulsively kisses Gerard's cheek. When he pulls back, he is flushed.
Gerard watches Mikey leave, then goes home himself. Frank is still out and the large house is quiet. Gerard misses his Court sometimes, the company of humans and vampires living together. He doesn't miss the responsibility, though. He has enough to worry about in his life.
He goes through the mail, sorting through bills and advertisements. Among the plain white envelopes is one that is different. It is made of folded parchment and sealed with black wax. There is no return address.
Gerard opens the letter carefully, recognizing the handwriting at once.
Gerard shakes his head in denial. He can't leave Mikey. He won't. Azrael will have to deal with his 'loneliness' himself.
“What's that?” Frank says from behind him. Gerard turns, surprised.
“I didn't hear you come in,” he says. “I didn't even feel you.”
Frank grins. “I'm working on shielding.”
“Well you're getting pretty good at it,” Gerard says, proud of his adopted childe.
“What has you in a tizzy?” Frank asks, taking the letter from Gerard's hands. He reads silently, then whistles low. “What are you going to do?”
Gerard shakes his head. “Write back and say I can't come, I guess. It isn't an order.”
“It sounds like it's pretty close to an order to me,” Frank says. “Although he does say 'please'.”
Gerard burns the letter in the fireplace.
“How did he find you, anyway?” Frank asks.
“I'm sure he has his ways,” Gerard murmurs. He watches the letter curl in on itself and burn. “Michael – Mikey – is coming for dinner tomorrow night.”
“I hope you're not cooking,” Frank says.
“We're not letting you near the kitchen,” Gerard says.
“I only set a fire maybe once. Or twice,” Frank says defensively.
Gerard smiles. “We'll get someone to come in and cook,” he says. “I think I know just the right person. Call Ray?”
Frank smiles and gets out his phone, scrolling through his contacts. He calls and offers Ray a scandalous amount of money to cook the next day. Gerard can hear Ray's voice answer back in excitement as he says yes.
Frank puts his phone away again and says, “I think he has a crush on me.”
“Ray?” Gerard says. He thinks for a moment, remembers the shy glances and flushing cheeks. “I think he has a crush on us both.”
“Can I have him?” Frank asks. “I've never had a pet before.”
Gerard laughs. “I think Ray would be more than just a pet,” he says. He's touched Ray's mind, seen the fierce intelligence and honesty there. He would be loyal, too, something that Frank values highly.
Frank nods, hearing Gerard's thoughts. “I'll flirt with him a little tomorrow night.”
Gerard laughs again. Frank's flirting is not a subtle thing.
“I can be subtle,” Frank pouts. “He plays guitar, too. We can talk about music. So when is Mikey coming?”
“He'll be here an hour after sunset,” Gerard says.
They go to bed, and Gerard talks softly about his night. Frank touches his mind to fill in the blanks, nodding as he does.
“He is frightened, but he wants you,” Frank says.
“I want him to love me,” Gerard admits. “I want him to remember.”
“You'll have to go slowly with him,” Frank tells him. “Get to know each other. Show him you're more than just a hungry vampire. He wants the danger, yes, but...”
“I want him to want me for myself,” Gerard says.
“He will. Give him time,” Frank says. Then he moves into Gerard's arms and says, “I will have to go slowly with Ray, as well. He doesn't know what we are. I don't want to scare him away.”
He nuzzles Gerard's neck, mouthing the skin there. Gerard tips his head back for him and says, “Go ahead.”
“I always want you,” Frank whispers, then bites down. He sucks at Gerard's blood, slow and shallow. He doesn't take more than a few mouthfuls before he pulls back and licks over the marks he's made.
Gerard can feel Frank's hardness, so he wraps a hand around his cock and begins to stroke. Frank moans and kisses him, then straddles his waist.
Gerard's cock presses against Frank's ass as he rocks against him. He doesn't want to fuck, not right now when dawn is so close upon them. This is enough.
Frank pushes into Gerard's hand and says, “Faster, Sire.”
Gerard complies and strokes him the way he likes, hard and rough. He leans up and kisses him again, hard and demanding. Possessive, even after all these years.
Their minds entwine, feeding off one another. Frank comes, gasping Gerard's name. Then he slides down and takes Gerard's cock into his mouth.
Frank sucks cock like he does everything else – with overwhelming enthusiasm. Gerard is bucking up into his mouth after only a few moments, groaning and sliding his hands into Frank's hair.
Frank looks up at him, a smile in his eyes. Come down my throat. I know you want to. He sends Gerard obscene images, some of them hardly realistic. Gerard sends an image back, that of what he's seeing now: Frank looking up at him with dark eyes, taking his cock between stretched lips, looking completely debauched and beautiful.
Gerard comes, his cock spurting into Frank's mouth. Frank swallows, moaning happily, then licks up what he missed. Gerard thinks Frank lets it dribble down his chin on purpose, just so his sire will lick it from his face. Gerard pulls him up, dragging his tongue from Frank's neck to his lips, then kisses him messily.
Frank nearly purrs in contentment. They rolls onto their sides and face each other, Gerard tracing his fingers over Frank's cheek lightly.
“I love you, childe,” he whispers.
Frank smiles and closes his eyes. “Love you, too. So much.”
They fall asleep with their arms wrapped around each other, just as they do most nights. The years together have only deepened their feelings for each other, pulled them together so that nothing could part them.
As Gerard falls asleep, he remembers back to when he couldn't love. He remembers his fierce anger, his unquenchable desire for violence and bloodshed. He's changed much over the centuries, and Frank has been a big part of his evolution. Now he even cares for humans, in his own way.
And this is the main reason he doesn't want to see Azrael. His sire doesn't have a touch of humanity in him, and he taught Gerard to be the same way. Gerard knows he'll be disappointed, perhaps even angry, at the way Gerard treats humans now.
Gerard no longer kills innocents. He respects humans and feeds from them carefully, keeping pain to a minimum. He gives them happy thoughts when they part, vague memories of pleasure and affection. He doesn't seek to incite fear, no matter how delicious it is. This respect goes against everything Azrael taught him.
He still feels affection for his sire, but the connection is weak. He doesn't know if he likes Azrael anymore. For the most part, he pities him.
He dreams of his turning and the times immediately after. He tosses in his sleep, feeling the pain and anguish of the humans he murdered for decades under Azrael's tutelage. He is vaguely aware of Frank holding him tightly, touching his mind and sending waves of love.
When he wakes, the sun is low in the sky, nearly set. He feels guilt. Frank is awake, watching him silently.
“I don't deserve to have Michael,” Gerard whispers.
Frank rolls his eyes and slaps him on the shoulder. “You're not the same person anymore.”
“Yes, I am. I still feel the urge to kill sometimes. I-”
“But you don't,” Frank says. “I know; I watched you change. You're different. Your heart is different.”
Gerard shakes his head. “Is it enough to make up for what I did in the past?”
“Do you think you can ever make it up to those you killed? It's impossible,” Frank says, and Gerard's heart sinks. “But you've turned yourself around. You've saved humans in the past. You treat them with dignity now, even when you don't have to.”
“Ray's downstairs,” Gerard says. He needs time to mull over Frank's words. “Go on down and flirt.”
Frank grins and gets dressed in a hurry, then practically flies out of the room. If Gerard wanted to, he could listen in on the conversation. He leaves them alone, though, dressing himself and thinking about Mikey.
Would Mikey accept him if he knew about all the people Gerard has killed? Probably not. It's just another thing to hide from him.
*
Mikey arrives promptly at 9:11, an hour after sunset. “I checked online for sunset times,” he says.
Gerard is oddly touched by the gesture. “Thank you,” he says, leading Mikey into the dining room. Ray is there, setting out the food. Frank is standing near him, and he grins widely as they enter the room.
“Mikey Way, I'd like to introduce Frank Iero. Frank, this is Mikey,” Gerard says almost formally. “And the gentleman who prepared our food is Ray Toro. Ray, this looks delicious.”
“I didn't know vampires ate real food,” Mikey murmurs softly. Ray must hear him, because he looks confused.
Gerard looks at Frank, and Frank takes the hint. Ray's eyes go slightly glassy as he exits the room, Frank on his heels.
“What was that?” Mikey asks.
“Oh. Ray doesn't know we're vampires,” Gerard explains. “Frank wants to break it to him gently.”
“Not really a gentle way to put it, is there? I mean, 'I suck blood' is pretty...”
Gerard looks at him as he trails off. “You aren't running away.”
“I did at first,” Mikey points out.
“But now you aren't,” Gerard says. “I could be evil. I could want to kill you.”
“Not inspiring a lot of confidence there, dude,” Mikey says, but Gerard can tell he's mostly joking, even though his voice stays soft and serious.
Gerard smiles. “I don't kill humans for no good reason,” he says. Not anymore, he thinks.
“What would you call a good reason?” Mikey asks curiously.
“If they threatened someone I loved,” Gerard says slowly. “I can be very protective.”
Mikey shivers even though the room is warm.
“Sit down and eat,” Gerard says. “I don't want all this food going to waste.”
“Will Frank be joining us?” Mikey asks, taking a seat. Gerard sits beside him at the head of the table.
“He's busy flirting with Ray right now,” Gerard says with a smile. The snippets of conversation he catches are amusing. Frank is close to just getting naked and offering himself. Subtlety is not his strong suit.
“You don't mind?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pours wine into their glasses and shakes his head. “Why would I mind? They like each other.”
“You aren't jealous?” Mikey presses.
“Frank and I are... solid. Unshakable. We've been together a long time,” Gerard explains, picking up his fork.
“Are you bored of him? Is that why you're after me?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pauses with his fork halfway to his mouth. “I don't think I will ever be bored of Frank. Once you get to know him you'll understand.”
“So... why? Why me?” Mikey asks.
“You're special,” Gerard says simply.
“I'm not,” Mikey denies. “I'm just me.”
Gerard smiles softly and chews his food. Then he says, “You're special to me. That is all you need to know.”
Mikey gives him a dubious look and takes a bite of his own food. It's a chicken fajita with Spanish rice, done to perfection. Gerard enjoys his own, reminding himself to pay Ray a handsome tip on top of the money he's been promised.
“So... vampires eat?” Mikey asks.
“Sometimes,” Gerard says. “I don't need to, but I can and do occasionally. Usually when I want to share dinner with someone. It's only polite. You wouldn't want me to sit and stare at you while you ate, would you?”
Mikey huffs and smiles. “No, that'd be pretty creepy.”
Gerard is reminded of Frank's comment from the week before, that Gerard was a 'creepy creepster' who broke into houses and watched underaged boys masturbate. If he could blush, he would be crimson right now.
“When will you be eighteen?” Gerard asks.
“Jailbait until September tenth,” Mikey says, smiling a little. “Do you mind?”
Michael's birthday was in the spring. Gerard remembers holding him when he was an infant, vowing to protect him. It happened lifetimes ago, but Gerard remembers it clearly.
“You're old enough to know what you want,” Gerard says. “In my day, you became a man at fourteen.”
“When was that? What year were you born?” Mikey asks.
Gerard waves the question away. “Does it matter?”
“I want to know just how much older than me you are,” Mikey says.
“I was twenty in sixteen sixty-five,” Gerard says, unknowingly echoing what he once told Frank. “And twenty forever after.”
Mikey stares at him, blinking. Gerard touches his mind and finds a tempest of questions and insecurities.
“It's okay,” Gerard says. “You aren't too young, neither are you too naïve. You're perfect to me, just the way you are.”
“You barely know me,” Mikey murmurs.
“I've seen into your soul,” Gerard says.
Mikey shivers again and looks down at his barely touched food. “It isn't fair that I can't return the favor.”
“I'll answer any question you have,” Gerard says.
But Frank chooses that moment to walk into the room, looking self-satisfied. Smugness radiates from him, and Gerard touches his mind. He sees images of Ray blushing and asking him on a date. A date! Frank has never been on a date, not that Gerard can remember. But Frank is full of satisfaction at the encounter, and Gerard smiles.
Mikey is watching them. “You make my head feel funny,” he says. “When you do that with your minds.”
Frank pauses and then takes his seat at Gerard's other side, across from Mikey. “You can feel that?”
“It's like a buzzing,” Mikey says.
Frank and Gerard exchange a look.
He'll be strong in the mind arts when he is turned, Gerard sends.
Frank nods and picks at his food.
“Did it go well with Ray?” Mikey asks, false innocence ringing in his voice.
Frank grins. “We have a date.”
“And what will you do on this date?” Gerard asks.
“Play video games?” Frank says with a shrug. “I don't know. Maybe a movie.”
“You play video games?” Mikey asks.
“Oh, yeah. I rock. I kick ass,” Frank says.
Mikey frowns a little, taking that in. “Vampires are just so... normal,” he murmurs.
“Not completely,” Gerard says.
“Well, yeah, there's the blood thing, and the mind thing, but other than that...”
“Obviously he's never heard you growl,” Frank jokes, but Mikey's eyes get big.
“You growl? Like a dog?” he asks.
“Like a vampire,” Gerard says, emphasizing the last word. “There's nothing dog-like about it.”
Frank giggles and pours himself a glass of wine.
“Can I hear it?” Mikey asks, his voice curious.
“I'm sure you will sooner or later. It's not something I can do on command,” Gerard says.
Mikey nods slowly, then eats more of his dinner. “This is very good.”
“Ray's a good cook,” Frank says proudly.
“Better than you, Mr. Firestarter,” Gerard murmurs.
Mikey watches them, shaking his head a little. Gerard touches his mind on instinct, and sees that he's confused and a little appalled at how normal they are.
“I told you not to do that,” Mikey says, waving his hand as if batting away a fly. Gerard withdraws from his mind.
“I'm sorry, it's a habit,” he says.
“I don't like you doing it without permission,” Mikey says.
Gerard nods and drinks his wine.
“Does alcohol effect you?” Mikey asks.
“If I drink enough of it,” Gerard says. “I'm more likely to get drunk from feeding from someone who's inebriated, however. If it's in the blood, it's easier for me to digest.”
Gerard went through a period of time drinking from people in speakeasies, getting drunk on blood and bootlegged whiskey. Those memories are a blur, and he hasn't gone back to feeding to get drunk in a long time. He missed Michael then, despaired that he would never find him. Frank didn't know what to do. But Brian came along again and picked him up, scolded him, dusted him off, and reminded him that life went on and loved ones would always find each other again.
Gerard hasn't seen Brian in decades now, but he still holds a special place in his heart. He just doesn't ache for him the way he aches for his Michael.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Mikey says.
Gerard shakes his head and says, “Just remembering an old friend.”
Mikey looks like he will ask more, but Frank butts in and says, “So what grade are you in?”
“I'm a junior,” Mikey says. “I'm thinking of dropping out, though.”
“Why?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I hate school. I'd rather hang out and … I don't know. Do anything but homework, anyway.”
“What would you do without an education?” Gerard asks. “You couldn't get a job.”
“You sound like my mom. She wants me to go to college,” Mikey says.
“College is good,” Frank says. Both he and Gerard have taken night classes in the past, eager to learn more about the modern world.
“Why would I go to extra school if I don't have to?” Mikey asks.
“What do you want to do instead?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I'd like to be in a band.”
“Play anything?” Frank asks.
“Sorta. Bass, a little,” Mikey says.
“I'm in a band. If you get better, I could set you up,” Frank says. “It doesn't pay the bills, though. You'd still have to go to school.”
“I saw you play that night,” Mikey says slowly. “I'd forgotten.”
“You've had a lot on your mind since then,” Gerard says. “It's understandable.”
“So... what do you do?” Mikey asks Gerard.
“What do you mean?” Gerard asks.
“I mean, Frank's in a band, so what do you do? Are you in a band, too?”
Gerard laughs. “I'm an artist, I guess. I've sold a few of my pieces. I'm working on a graphic novel.”
“You guess?” Frank says teasingly. “You've been painting for centuries and you guess you're an artist?”
Gerard shrugs and laughs again. Mikey joins in, and the sound of his laughter makes Gerard stop and stare at him.
Mikey goes silent, looking at him. “What?”
“I've never heard you laugh before,” Gerard says.
“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Mikey asks.
Gerard smiles. “Your laughter is a very good thing.” It's musical to him, so familiar and yet not.
Mikey smiles shyly and returns to his food.
After they eat, Frank proposes a walk outside. “Don't worry,” he says to Mikey, “We'll protect you.”
“Stop reading my mind,” Mikey says.
“Didn't have to, that time,” Frank says happily. “It was written all over your face.”
They walk down by the canal, where the cherry-blossom trees are in full bloom. The fragrance is thick in the air, nearly overwhelming to Frank and Gerard's senses. Gerard concentrates on Mikey's scent: light sweat, soap, shampoo, and musk.
Mikey looks at him strangely when Gerard leans in close. “Are you sniffing me?”
Gerard pulls back, smiling. “I like the way you smell.”
“I want to smell him,” Frank says, leaning far into Mikey's personal space.
Mikey laughs and pushes him back. “Stop that. Crazy vampires.”
“I'm not crazy,” Frank says seriously.
Gerard sends him a wave of reassurance. “No, you aren't.”
Mikey looks back and forth between them as if trying to figure out what they aren't saying, then seems to give up and shrugs. “Okay. Not crazy. Eccentric.”
Frank grins and takes Mikey's hand. Mikey lets him, then looks at Gerard. Hesitantly, Gerard reaches out and takes his other hand. They walk like this for awhile, Mikey between them. It's a warm, humid night. Bats fly above them. Mikey looks up.
“Can you do that?” he asks. “Turn into a bat? Fly?”
“We can't turn into bats,” Gerard says. “But we could outrun them.”
“Show me,” Mikey says.
Frank giggles and runs away, barely a blur in the night.
Gerard looks at Mikey. “Do you trust me?”
Mikey bites his lip and nods. “I guess.”
Gerard picks him up and pulls him against his chest. “Hold on.”
Then he runs. He runs full-out, carrying Mikey with him. Mikey gasps as the wind hits him, and he turns his face away and into Gerard's chest. Gerard passes Frank easily – he's always been faster – and runs straight out of the Belleville. He feels Frank behind him, struggling to catch up, but he doesn't slow. He keeps running, on and on, until he reaches the river. He takes it with one leap, and Mikey cries out in alarm.
He stops then, still holding Mikey. “Trust me,” he says.
Mikey is shaken, but he nods. “I do. I just thought...”
“I wouldn't let you drown,” Gerard says gently. “I will never let anything bad happen to you.”
“Where are we?” Mikey asks, looking around.
“The city,” Gerard says. “Want to go dance?”
“...New York,” Mikey says flatly. “You carried me all the way to New York?”
Frank finally comes, panting and flailing. “You left me behind!”
Gerard grins and kisses him hard. “You should learn to keep up with me.”
When Gerard turns back to Mikey, he's watching them both with interest.
“We're going to dance,” Mikey finally says. “Are you coming with us?”
“Where are we going?” Frank asks. “You can't take him into Albion with us. He's not claimed.”
Mikey raises an eyebrow. “Claimed?”
“Something you aren't ready for yet,” Frank says, ignoring the look Gerard gives him.
“We'll go somewhere else, then,” Gerard says, waving his hand.
“What's Albion?” Mikey asks.
“Vampire club,” Frank says. “You go in there a human, you come out a slave. It's not safe unless you've been claimed by a vampire, and even then it's iffy.”
Mikey shivers. “Let's stay away from there, then.”
Gerard rolls his eyes. “It never crossed my mind,” he says. “We'll go to Gotham.”
“Vampire friendly, human safe,” Frank explains to Mikey. “There are rules in place.”
“I like the name,” Mikey says. “Does anyone dress up as the big black Bat?”
Frank laughs. “They dress up, alright.”
*
The mood inside Gotham is dark and friendly. Mikey is carded at the door, but Frank quickly thralls the bouncer to let them enter together. Several people shift position as the vampires enter with their human companion, and Gerard recognizes a couple of them. He dismisses them, then scans the others for threats.
They greet him without hostility. This is a safe place, a place where vampires and humans intermingle, where no one is better than another. Gerard relaxes.
Mikey is watching him. “Safe?” he asks. His intuition is a beautiful thing. He reads Gerard's body language like Gerard reads minds.
“Yes,” Gerard says, pulling him out onto the floor.
Bodies writhe around them, dressed in black – some in leather, some in chains, all black, everywhere. Frank is the only one in the place wearing red. Mikey's shirt blends in well, and Gerard always wears black.
Mikey dances close, peering into Gerard's face.
“What is it?” Gerard asks.
“Do you want to do that to me?” Mikey asks. “The claim, I mean.”
Something must show on Gerard's face because Mikey nods as if he's answered.
“I've only ever claimed one human before,” Gerard says.
“Who?” Mikey asks.
“Frank,” Gerard answers. Frank moves to their side, dancing against a girl with many piercings. He's smiling at her, telling her about his latest tattoo.
Mikey looks over at him, smiling faintly. “And then you turned him.”
“Not exactly,” Gerard says. “But this is a story for another time.”
“I want to know,” Mikey murmurs. “I want to know everything about you.”
“Just dance with me for now,” Gerard says, pulling him tight against him. Their bodies press close, Mikey hot and damp against Gerard's cool dryness.
“Tell me about claiming?” Mikey asks against Gerard's ear. “What do you want to do to me?”
Gerard growls softly. “I want to make you mine.”
Mikey shivers again and presses his hardening cock against Gerard's hip. “Look into my mind,” he says. “Can you feel what you do to me?”
He can, even without touching Mikey's mind. Mikey smells of arousal now, thick and permeating. Gerard sends him a wave of desire. “Do you feel how much I want you?”
Mikey goes weak in his arms and Gerard has to hold him up.
“Sorry, I didn't realize it was that strong,” Gerard murmurs in his ear.
“Holy shit,” Mikey says.
And then Gerard realizes his mistake. He sent all his emotions to Mikey, not just his lust. His love, his devotion, his everything. Even the possessiveness that drives Gerard to hold Mikey closer and growl at an approaching vampire.
Mikey doesn't even notice. He's too busy collecting himself again after the onslaught of Gerard's emotions.
“I'm sorry,” Gerard says. “I miscalculated my hold over my feelings when I'm with you.”
“Oh,” Mikey says. “You feel a lot.”
Gerard catches his gaze and nods. Mikey's eyes are large now as he stares back.
“You feel all that... for me?” he asks softly.
Gerard can't do more than nod.
Instead of running away as Gerard expects him to, Mikey rests his head on Gerard's shoulder. He continues to dance, albeit slowly now. “I don't know what to say to that.”
“Shh. You don't have to answer my feelings,” Gerard says. “I know this is still new to you.”
Gerard is still touching Mikey's mind, so he begins to pull away.
Don't, Mikey sends hesitantly. I've gotten used to it.
Gerard bathes Mikey's mind with reassurance, flooding through the cracks of denial and hesitancy. Mikey sighs comfortably and holds Gerard closer.
Frank dances closer to them, and Gerard reaches out for him. Frank looks at Mikey, then places a hand on Mikey's back as he grinds against Gerard's side.
“Okay?” Gerard asks Mikey.
“Yeah,” Mikey says. He leans against Frank's hand and Frank moves behind him, pressing against his back.
They move as one, slowly and to their own music. Gerard feels only contentment and safety from Mikey, no discomfort at all. Gerard smiles at Frank over Mikey's shoulder and gently kisses Mikey's temple.
They get Mikey home safely before the dawn. He seems tired, utterly worn out emotionally, yet when Gerard touches his mind one last time he finds only happiness.
“And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest,” Gerard murmurs in his ear before Mikey leaves.
Mikey smiles tiredly and says, “Are you going to kiss me?”
“If I start now I won't want to stop,” Gerard says.
“Is that a no?” Mikey asks, leaning closer.
Gerard shakes his head mutely and presses his lips against Mikey's. It's gentle and soft, something he's not often able to do. But he loves this human, loves him with all of his soul. So he brushes his lips across Mikey's like a feather, then pulls away.
Mikey has his eyes closed and he's clinging to Gerard's shoulders as if he might fall.
“Go home before you get in trouble with your mother,” Gerard says gently.
Mikey nods and climbs into his car. “Can I come again tomorrow night?”
“You're always welcome here,” Gerard says.
Gerard watches as Mikey drives away. Frank is by his side again, watching with him.
“You were gentle with him,” Frank says. “More than you ever were with me.”
“Jealous?” Gerard asks.
“No. I know what he means to you,” Frank says.
“He's so young,” Gerard says. “He doesn't know what he's getting into.”
“He's following his heart,” Frank says quietly.
“I don't want to break it,” Gerard says.
“You have to be careful with him,” Frank says. “Keep moving slowly, even if he wants more.”
“I want to turn him,” Gerard says. “I want the assurance that he'll be with me forever.”
Frank wraps an arm around his waist. “Even if you turn him, that will be his decision alone.”
Gerard doesn't look at him. “Then I'll have to make sure he chooses me, won't I?”
*
“So tell me about Frank,” Mikey says, holding a game controller up high as his man jumps on the screen. It is two months to the day after their first meeting. They are just hanging out, playing video games in Gerard and Frank's house. It's getting late, but neither of them wants to say goodbye.
Gerard pauses the game. “What do you want to know?”
“If you didn't turn him into a vampire, who did?” Mikey asks. “And why do you call him your childe if you weren't the one who did it?”
“I adopted him,” Gerard says slowly, putting down his controller. “He wasn't turned in the usual way, with love or affection. His maker was insane. She tortured him, then turned him so he wouldn't break under more torture.”
Mikey's eyes widen as Gerard talks, and he grabs Gerard's hand. “I thought you claimed him before that.”
“I did, but then Frank found out something about me that made him run away. I tried to keep an eye on him, but...”
“You couldn't protect him? Even though he was yours?” Mikey asks.
Gerard shakes his head. “He was in terrible shape when Brian found him and brought him back to me-”
“Who's Brian?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pauses for a moment. “He's a very good friend,” he says. “He's...” He doesn't know how to describe Brian. He was Gerard's sire in another life, and Gerard feels closer to him than he does to Azrael.
“You love him,” Mikey murmurs.
“Yes,” Gerard says. “Very much.”
“Where is he now?” Mikey asks.
“Sleeping, most likely,” Gerard says. “The last I heard from him, he was in California. But that's been some time ago.”
“You don't seem too broken up about being apart from him,” Mikey says.
“His childe, Julia, she's the one who tortured Frank. He could have killed her but he didn't. He let her live,” Gerard explains. The pain has lessened over the years, but he still hates that Brian allowed Julia to keep her life after what she did to Gerard's Court.
“Long story, huh?” Mikey says. “So how did you adopt Frank? Are there papers you sign or something?”
“There's a ritual,” Gerard says.
Mikey fiddles with the seam of the sofa cushion. “What about claiming? Is there a ritual involved there, too?”
“Sort of. It's not quite as involved,” Gerard says. “I take your blood, and you take some of mine.”
“That's all?” Mikey asks.
“No,” Gerard says with a smile. “There's lots of sex involved too.”
“Sounds cool,” Mikey says, smiling back. “What does it do?”
“Prevents you from growing old. It shows other vampires that you're taken and not to be messed with. Gives you strength and some protection against … disease and the like.”
The disease that took Michael in the first place flashes through Gerard's mind and he grimaces.
“What?”
“Do you believe in Fate?” Gerard asks. He feels as if his future hangs in the balance at this moment. He remembers Azrael's rantings against God and Fate and anything of the like. He knows in his heart that Mikey is nothing like him, is closer to human than anyone Gerard has ever met.
Mikey chews his lip. “I do. I think. I mean, I think I always did, but after I met you I really believed, you know?”
Gerard smiles. “I do know.”
Mikey slides his hand into Gerard's and entwines their fingers. “Why haven't you taken me to bed yet? Why haven't you claimed me?”
“It hasn't been that long,” Gerard says.
“It's been two months,” Mikey says. “And you know I want to.”
“When you drink my blood, everything will change,” Gerard says. What he doesn't say is that Mikey will likely remember their past lives together after that. Gerard is both eager and nervous about this.
“Change how?” Mikey asks.
“We'll be connected,” Gerard says. “More in tune with each other. Able to speak telepathically, if you choose. Able to read each other's thoughts and emotions.”
“Well, you do that to me already,” Mikey says. “I think I'd like being able to turn the tables on you.”
Gerard smiles and cups his face, bringing him forward for a gentle kiss.
A knock at the door disturbs them. Gerard sends his mind out and freezes.
“Leave,” he says to Mikey. “Out the back door. Don't look back, just go.”
“What?” Mikey says, and Gerard pulls him to his feet and starts pushing him towards the back of the house.
But Azrael is there on the back steps when Gerard opens the door.
“Going somewhere, childe of mine?” he asks. He looks menacing standing there in the dark, dressed all in black with long, black hair and red eyes. Beside Gerard, Mikey shudders and takes a step back. Azrael smiles. “And who is this? A human?”
Gerard swallows hard and holds the door open. “Mikey was just leaving.”
“Mikey. Mikey, what an immature name. Do you mind if I call you Michael?”
Gerard holds his breath and stares at Azrael.
Mikey nods. “My grandmother calls me Michael.”
“Not Gerard?” Azrael asks. “That's strange. Then again, the name might bring back bad memories for him, poor childe.”
Azrael is acting even more unnerving than usual. More sinister. Gerard remembers well how he would treat a human before feasting on their blood. That is the way he's treating them both right now.
“Sire,” Gerard says, trying to placate him. “You and I have many centuries to catch up on. Let the human leave.”
Azrael grabs Mikey's arm and pulls him close, looking him up and down. “I fed mere hours ago, and yet I find myself hungering yet again.”
Gerard growls. “Let him go.”
Azrael laughs but keeps holding Mikey's arm. He's pressing hard into the muscle and Mikey winces. “You haven't claimed him yet,” Azrael says, looking at Mikey's neck.
“I was going to do that tonight,” Gerard says.
“So is this human the reason why you neglected to come when I called for you?” Azrael asks. “If I were a smaller creature, I'd be jealous.”
Mikey looks back and forth between them, his fear heightening. Gerard touches his mind with reassurance, but his own anxiety taints the emotion.
“Do you believe in an afterlife, Michael?” Azrael asks, his fangs extended and leaning towards Mikey's neck.
“I guess,” Mikey says.
“You believe in God?” Azrael asks, breathing on Mikey's neck.
Gerard roughly pulls Mikey away from him and positions himself to Mikey's front. “Leave him alone.”
“He's just another human,” Azrael hisses. “He cannot love you, not truly. He cannot accept you for what you are.”
Gerard holds his head high and is about to answer when Mikey says, “I do accept him.”
“You have no idea who he is!” Azrael rages, lunging at Mikey. Gerard stands between them, pushing Azrael back with both hands.
“Sire!” he shouts. “Enough of this!”
“Yes, I've had quite enough of his kind. Trying to live above their stations, murdering without cause. How can you associate with this one, Gerard?” Azrael says. “Ah, I see. It is because of your brother, isn't it? This one looks like him. He feels familiar to you. You think he holds your brother's soul, don't you?”
Mikey goes still, listening.
“But humans don't have souls, Gerard,” Azrael says. “They are worse than us. They kill each other, and kill our kind as well. I've had enough of humans. I will not stand to let this one influence you.”
“Let him go,” Gerard says again, softly, knowing now he spoke to a madman. “And he will not trouble you again.”
Mikey begins to slip around Gerard, heading towards the door slowly.
“No. I think I will kill him,” Azrael says. He looks at Mikey and licks his fangs. “I like young blood.”
Mikey trembles and Gerard sends frantically in his mind for Frank. He should have done so sooner, he knows. Now it may be too late.
“You cannot kill him,” Gerard says. “He's under my protection.”
“Like I said before, you haven't claimed him,” Azrael says.
“If you're hungry, I'll send for a donor,” Gerard says desperately. “Or we'll hunt. It's been so long since we've hunted together, hasn't it?”
“Why does he mean so much to you?” Azrael snarls.
“Please, Sire. Please,” Gerard begs. “Leave him alone.”
Azrael stares with loathing in his red eyes as Mikey slips out the door. He doesn't stop him, though, even though Gerard knows he could.
“He looks just like your brother,” Azrael whispers, still looking after Mikey.
Gerard swallows hard. Azrael could still choose to go after Mikey, it would only take the slightest misstep.
“Do you want to go to the city?” Gerard asks. “The hunting grounds are fertile there.”
Azrael finally looks at him. “What has happened to you, that you care so much for a human?”
“I've changed,” Gerard says.
Azrael snarls and presses him against the wall. “You are what I made you to be.”
Gerard stares into Azrael's eyes, touching his mind. “I'm not the same creature you made.”
Azrael recoils from the emotion he receives from Gerard's mind. “No, I see you are not.”
“Gerard!” Frank calls, then runs into the room. “What-”
“And who is this?” Azrael asks, looking Frank up and down.
“This is my childe, Frank,” Gerard says.
“Ah. So you did make a childe,” Azrael says. “A grandchilde for me. How ... familial.”
“Frank, this is Azrael,” Gerard says. “My sire.” He's still pinned against the wall and he's sure it makes for a confusing sight.
Frank touches Gerard's mind. Where's Mikey?
He went home, Gerard sends back.
Azrael lets go of Gerard and stalks over to Frank. He leans down and sniffs Frank's neck, breathing in his scent. Frank is very still, looking at Gerard.
“You've done good, Gerard,” Azrael murmurs.
Gerard knows Azrael must be out of his mind with grief over his sire's death, and so he goes along with whatever Azrael wants.
Azrael wants them to hunt as a family, so Frank and Gerard agree. They run into the city, Azrael much faster than either of them. They go to a dance club and Azrael points out a young man he wants to watch Frank feed from.
Frank thralls the human and leads him over to a dark corner. He feeds, slowly and deliberately, and Azrael huffs. “Kill him, boy,” he says.
Frank blinks at Azrael and turns to Gerard.
“No,” Gerard says. “We don't kill innocents anymore.”
Azrael tilts his head. “Innocent? Your idealism is misguided. I thought I taught you better than this.”
Frank licks the human's wounds closed and sends him on his way. Azrael focuses and thralls another human to approach him.
Gerard watches as Azrael bares his fangs, holding the woman immobile with his mind. Fright appears on the woman's face, but she is unable to move.
“Do you see, Gerard? This is how you treat them. Like cattle to be slaughtered. Because that is all they are, do you understand?” Azrael grabs the woman by one arm and drags her close. He rips into her throat is if into a piece of meat.
He laps at her wound, wasting more than he drinks. She dies with a horrified gurgle. He releases her, letting her body fall to the ground.
“You used to enjoy such things,” he says to Gerard. “Surely you haven't forgotten.”
Gerard feels sick and hungry at the same time.
“Humans are filthy creatures, childe,” Azrael says. “Only good for what they can give us. Blood. Sex. Companionship occasionally, but you can't count on them for that. They live so fast and die so easily.” He calls another human forward, this one a teenaged girl.
Gerard and Frank are working frantically to keep the crowd from noticing.
“Disposable,” Azrael says, taking the girl by the neck. “That is what they are. Animals, all of them.”
“Let her go,” Gerard says lowly.
Azrael looks up as if surprised. “Why? Do you want her, instead?”
He's mad. Deeply and truly mad, Frank sends.
Gerard nods at him and turns back to Azrael. “I haven't fed yet,” he says.
Azrael nearly throws the girl into Gerard's arms. Immediately, Gerard sends her feelings of safety and warmth. She smiles up at him, heavily thralled.
He bites into her neck and drinks slowly, savoring. He pays attention to her heartbeat so he doesn't take too much. Then he steadies her and lets her go.
“What was that?” Azrael says.
“That was me feeding,” Gerard says, staying calm. “Now we can go home.”
“You call this a hunt? One human each?” Azrael says.
“It is enough for us,” Gerard says.
“To survive? Yes. To live?” Azrael asks, and pauses.
“I live just fine,” Gerard says.
“What is at your home that you can offer me?” Azrael asks.
Gerard licks his lips and walks forward, with purpose. He presses against Azrael and murmurs, “I offer myself.”
In his mind, he can feel Frank's horror. But Azrael is Gerard's sire, and he doesn't know what else to do. He will let him fuck him and sleep, and tomorrow night Gerard will figure out what to do. He just has to buy some time.
Except Azrael laughs and pushes him away. “I don't think so, childe. I don't want you like this, with human compassion and … ethics. Why would I?”
It doesn't exactly wound Gerard, but he would be lying if he said it didn't hurt. Being rejected by one's sire is painful.
Gerard says, “You think I was so perfect before? I couldn't love. I couldn't give. I hurt those I should have protected.”
“Do you love me, childe?” Azrael asks curiously. He presses on Gerard's mind, forcing him to tell the truth.
“I feel affection for you,” Gerard admits. The pressure on his mind bears down until he says, “But I don't love you.”
“I thought not,” Azrael murmurs. “What of your childe? Do you love him?”
“Yes, I do,” Gerard says. “Very much.”
“And your human? The one you call Mikey?” Azrael says. “No, don't answer. I can see it in your mind. I could snap his neck like a dry twig, you know.”
Gerard, still under Azrael's influence, answers without qualm. “I would kill you before you could do that.”
Azrael, instead of getting angry, laughs at this statement. “You think you can kill your own sire?”
“If I have to,” Gerard says. “I'd rather not.”
Beside him, Frank is getting antsy. Shut up, Gee.
“What if I killed you first?” Azrael asks, pressing his hand over Gerard's heart. It's a hard press, as if he's contemplating going through the skin at that very moment.
What if he killed Gerard? Brian would rise, he knows. Brian would get revenge.
“Ah, I see it,” Azrael says, searching Gerard's memories. “Who is this Brian and why should he care so much?”
Azrael sifts through Gerard's memories as if they are sand. He sees linked memories, of Brigh long ago, of Brian near the present day, of fucking furiously and loving twice as fiercely. He sees Mihaitus, Michael, Mikey...
“No,” Azrael whispers.
Gerard blinks back tears at the suddenness of the memories flying through his head. He feels them all at once in this moment, the happy and the horrible.
“You believe,” Azrael says, hanging his head.
“Did you love Selim?” Gerard asks, wiping his eyes. “Because his soul will be reborn, someday. All you have to do is wait.”
“I loved him, I hated him. I long to be with him again,” Azrael whispers.
“Then you will,” Gerard says.
“I don't believe in Fate,” Azrael says.
“Then make your own,” Gerard says. “That is what you taught me, isn't it?”
Azrael looks up again, staring into Gerard's eyes. I don't believe in myself, either.
“Learn to,” Gerard says. “That's all I can say.”
Azrael reaches out and cups Gerard's chin. “How?”
Gerard takes his hand away gently. “First, you must get over your grief. Stop taking out Selim's murder on innocent people.”
How did Brian deal with Julia's grief?
“How long has it been since you slept?” Gerard asks. He knows Azrael will pick up on the meaning.
“I've never slept,” Azrael says, “Never for more than a week or so.”
“Maybe it's time,” Gerard says. “Sleep, and then when you wake, you can look for Selim.”
“How will I find him?” Azrael asks.
Gerard smiles a little. “Fate.”
*
When Gerard awakes the next night, he feels Mikey's presence in the house. He pads downstairs and follows the sound of a heartbeat into his studio.
Mikey has all the sheets off their canvases, and completed paintings pulled out all around. He looks up when Gerard comes through the door.
“What is this?” Mikey asks, pointing at one painting of Mihaitus. He's barely dressed, just a piece of linen draped over his shoulder.
“Someone I knew in another life,” Gerard answers truthfully.
Mikey's eyes narrow. “Your brother?”
Gerard nods.
“Tell me what I don't know, Gerard,” Mikey says. “Please.”
Gerard closes his eyes. “Once upon a time-”
“This isn't a fairy tale,” Mikey says.
“No, it isn't,” Gerard says. “Fairy tales always have a moral, and I can't find one for this story.”
“Do you believe in reincarnation? Is that what this is about?” Mikey asks.
Gerard closes his eyes. “I've known you before, yes.”
“Were you going to tell me about it?” Mikey asks. “Or just leave me in the dark?”
“I would have told you after I claimed you,” Gerard says. “You would remember then. When you take my blood, you'll know for yourself.”
“You don't love me for myself,” Mikey says blank-faced.
“I-”
“You love me because I look like your brother,” Mikey says.
“No,” Gerard says slowly, dragging the word out. “I love you for your soul.”
“That's pretty,” Mikey says, then laughs. The sound is hollow.
“Can I tell you about him? About them?” Gerard asks, waving his hand at the paintings. “Will you listen with an open mind?”
Mikey looks lost. Confused. He nods hesitantly.
Gerard sighs and goes over to his favorite portrait, one of Michael at fifteen, smiling widely. The painting is of a time shortly before his death. “My brother was only sixteen when the plague took him. Do you know about the Great Plague of London?”
Mikey shakes his head mutely.
“It was a later outbreak of the Black Death,” Gerard murmurs, looking into the eyes of the portrait. “It started in 1665. I was twenty, unmarried, the heir to my family's fortune. It struck the docks first, and then the poor outside the city. But it wasn't long before it spread to London itself.”
Mikey nods slowly, listening.
“By September, our neighbors' houses were quiet, and our own house was ill,” Gerard says. “The servants fled, probably to die elsewhere. I watched our parents succumb to the plague, laid them out in the parlor myself. I wasn't sick, not yet. Then Michael fell ill.”
Gerard swallows and looks away from the painting.
“He was only a year younger than me,” Mikey says softly.
“He was... he'd never...”
“He was a virgin,” Mikey says.
“Yes. There was so much of life he never experienced. I remember thinking that as I watched him become more and more sick,” Gerard says. His voice is thick.
Mikey takes his hand and looks at the painting. “His eyes are dark.”
Gerard nods. “Your cheekbones are higher and your hair is darker,” he says.
“Tell me the rest,” Mikey urges, squeezing his hand.
“I prayed. I believed in God so much, and I believed he would spare Michael,” Gerard says. “I prayed until my voice was hoarse.”
“But he died,” Mikey whispers.
Gerard closes his eyes tightly. “He asked me to climb into bed with him. I did. I held him, and then I fell asleep. I was so tired. And when I woke, he was cool again. I thought the fever had broken.”
“But that wasn't it,” Mikey says. He wraps an arm around Gerard's shoulders and hugs him.
“He died during the night, in my arms. I... I couldn't bear to leave him, so I stayed just like that. And that's when Azrael found me.” He leans his head on Mikey's shoulder.
“I'm not him,” Mikey says softly. “Even if I believed in reincarnation, even if I had memories of him – I'm still not him. I'm me. I'm Mikey, not Michael or whoever the one in the toga is.”
“Mihaitus,” Gerard murmurs. “We were twins.”
“Yeah, but it wasn't you, was it?” Mikey asks. “And I'm an only child. Plus, I don't think I'd want to fuck my own brother, you know? No offense.”
“None taken,” Gerard says dryly.
“So I'm not him. I need you to understand that,” Mikey says.
“I do,” Gerard says. “I have memories of past lives, and I know I'm a separate person from them. I'll remember that you are, too.”
Mikey bites his bottom lip. “I don't know if I want to remember dying,” he says.
Gerard makes a face. “It isn't pleasant. But I'll be right here for you.”
“Did you know Frank in a previous life?” Mikey says, then frowns. “I can't believe I'm talking about this like it's true.”
“No, I didn't know Frank.” Gerard smiles a little. “It is true. I didn't accept it well at first, myself. You're taking this much easier than I did.”
Mikey shrugs. “How did you find out?”
“Brian,” Gerard says. “We were together in two previous lives.”
“Ah,” Mikey says, as if something suddenly fell into place. “You must really miss him.”
“I do. But not as much as I would miss you,” Gerard says.
Mikey moves closer and says, “Would you love me if I wasn't your brother?”
“You aren't my brother,” Gerard says slowly. “But … yes, if I knew you. I would love you no matter who you were.”
“Sweet talker,” Mikey mutters, then presses his lips against Gerard's.
Gerard kisses back, wrapping his arms around Mikey, pulling him closer.
“What do you want?” Mikey asks. “Truthfully. What do you want from me?”
“I want to turn you,” Gerard whispers against his lips.
Mikey stiffens, then relaxes in increments. “Why?”
“Because I don't want to lose you,” Gerard says. “Because I want to share my blood with you. Because I want you to be my childe.”
“I'm not ready for that,” Mikey says. “Is that okay?”
“I'm in no hurry,” Gerard says. “Though I should claim you to protect you.”
“Your sire doesn't like me,” Mikey murmurs.
“He doesn't really like humans all that much right now,” Gerard explains. “He lost his sire to a human mob a few months ago.”
“Would it be painful to lose a sire?” Mikey asks.
Gerard nods. “The connection between sire and childe is strong.”
“I want that with you,” Mikey whispers. “Just not yet.”
“You should finish school,” Gerard says.
Mikey groans and rolls his eyes. “Can we not talk about school right now?”
Gerard smiles and presses against him. “Would you rather I take you to bed?”
“Yes,” Mikey breathes.
Gerard leads him up the stairs slowly, to the bedchamber that he shares with Frank. But Frank will not be home for many hours. He's having his date with Ray. Gerard wishes him the best and puts him out of his head.
Mikey slides his hands down Gerard's sides and tugs at his shirt. “Off?”
Gerard nods and holds his hands up, letting Mikey take the lead. His shirt is quickly dropped onto the floor and then his hands are tugging at Mikey's clothes.
Mikey is beautiful. Gerard must say this aloud, because Mikey blushes and shakes his head. “Not like you,” he says.
But once Mikey is naked and spread out below him, Gerard has to say it again. “You're gorgeous, Mikey,” he says, leaning down to kiss him.
Mikey is hot from head to toe. Gerard has forgotten what it feels like to be with a human. Mikey's skin is giving off heat like a furnace, and Gerard presses against him, soaking up the warmth.
He's careful, only biting a little with blunt teeth, tracing patterns with his tongue down Mikey's throat. Mikey moans and wraps his arms tightly around him, holding him close. Gerard can feel the throb of his cock against his skin.
“Go into my mind,” Mikey says. “I want you to see what I feel.”
Gerard touches Mikey's mind and feels overwhelming waves of love, adoration, and desire. Gerard opens his mind to Mikey, projecting what he's feeling into his mind. Soon, Mikey will be able to touch his mind on his own, but for now he needs help.
Mikey gasps when he feels the depth of Gerard's feelings. “Fuck,” he says softly.
Gerard smiles and takes Mikey's face in his hands, then presses their foreheads together gently. “Tell me what you want.”
Mikey swallows audibly, then whispers, “Bite me. I want you to bite me.”
Growling lightly, Gerard nuzzles Mikey's neck. Mikey shivers and tilts his head back, exposing his throat. Gerard licks up Mikey's throat to his chin, then moves over to the side of his neck to kiss there lightly.
“C'mon, Gee. Do it,” Mikey says.
Gerard bites. His fangs slice through Mikey's skin, tapping the vein. Gerard sucks hard, blood flowing into his mouth.
Mikey tastes like ambrosia, food of the gods. His blood is thick and full of life. Gerard swallows his first mouthful and moans. He knows not to take too much, but he wants so much more.
You'll have such a pretty scar, Gerard sends.
“Oh, God,” Mikey breathes, rocking up against him. “Harder.”
Gerard clamps down harder, his fangs driving deeper until they can go no further. He drinks slowly, petting Mikey's hair.
When he's had enough – just a little bit more – he pulls back and runs his lips over the twin wounds, smearing blood across Mikey's neck. Then he bites into his wrist and offers it to Mikey. “Just a little,” he says.
Mikey licks his lips, staring at the blood dripping from Gerard's wrist. Then he takes it into his mouth, sucking lightly. He swallows, then swallows again.
“That's enough,” Gerard says softly, and pulls his wrist away.
Then Gerard gets the lube from the bedside and slicks his fingers.
Mikey licks his lips nervously. “I've never gone this far before.”
Gerard pauses and then says, “Roll over. Get up on your hands and knees. It'll be easier that way.”
Mikey obeys, looking at Gerard over his shoulder. “I trust you.”
Gerard leans down and kisses the base of his spine, then rubs over his hole with slick fingers. “Have you ever done this to yourself?”
“Yeah,” Mikey says, rocking back a little. “I can take it.”
“Reach out to me,” Gerard murmurs, guiding Mikey's mind to his own, showing him the way.
Mikey gasps as their minds touch. Their emotions swirl around each other in spirals, until it is impossible to tell who is feeling what. It is only important that the emotions are there. There is so much devotion, so much love between them.
Gerard pushes two fingers inside and Mikey rocks back on the intrusion, taking them faster than Gerard would have thought. Memories roll over them both, and Gerard sees Mikey riding his own fingers, his head thrown back, his mind consumed with Gerard.
“Oh,” Gerard breathes as his fingers slip past the tight ring of muscle and push in deep. Mikey is so hot, burning like a furnace. He clenches around Gerard's fingers, then begs for more.
Gerard slicks up again, then adds a third finger. Mikey whimpers and pants, pushing back so that he opens up. Gerard's cock twitches with want and leaks at the tip.
Mikey shifts on his hands and knees, rocking back on Gerard's hand, fucking himself. The lines of his body are long, his muscles lithe in a way that is simply gorgeous. “Please,” he gasps, angling his body for more.
Gerard pulls his fingers out slowly and slicks his cock. He moves into position and rubs the head over Mikey's hole, not quite teasing. Mikey moans and goes still, whispering, Please, please, please... in Gerard's mind.
With one hand on Mikey's hip, Gerard presses inside. Slow, so slow, until Mikey rocks back and takes him faster. Then he is in and Mikey is feeling full and stretched, just the slightest hint of pain in his mind among the nearly overwhelming pleasure.
Gerard sends Mikey the sensations he feels, so that Mikey whimpers at the feeling of his own tight heat.
“Fuck,” Mikey whispers. “More, please...”
And Gerard gives it to him. He slides out, slowly, then angles himself just right and thrusts back in. Mikey cries out as Gerard's cock slides over his prostate. He is shaking on his knees. His arms give out and he leans on his elbows, his ass high in the air for Gerard to take.
Gerard sends him a picture of them from his perspective, so that Mikey can see the long line of his spine, the smooth skin of his back. He sends sensations again, of slick heat and tight muscle. Mikey whimpers and begs without words for more.
Slowly, Gerard begins to thrust in earnest. He focuses everything on Mikey's pleasure, so that his cock is hitting his prostate with every slide, so that when his fingers dig into Mikey's hips it's just the way Mikey wants them to.
“More,” Mikey says, his voice rough and low. His cock is leaking and bobbing, and Gerard wraps his hand around it and begins to stroke.
Mikey gasps and thrusts into Gerard's hand, then moves back against his cock. He is trapped between two sensations, thrusting and rocking back hard, until he's moving in tandem with Gerard. They rock together as one, Mikey fucking and being fucked, Gerard stroking and thrusting deep and hard.
Mikey climbs higher and higher into pleasure, reaching up until he's flying for one long, glorious moment. They are so tightly linked in their minds that Mikey's orgasm triggers Gerard's and they come together, two voices crying out in ecstasy.
They come down slowly, both of them panting, their bodies twitching with aftershocks. Gerard moves onto the bed, rolling on his back, and Mikey curls up against his side.
Their minds are still connected, and feelings of contentment and love flow back and forth between them.
“I'm yours now,” Mikey murmurs, kissing Gerard's chest.
“You've always been mine,” Gerard says. He pets Mikey's hair and twirls pieces between his fingertips. Mikey's hair is straight and brown, so unlike Michael's blond curls.
Mikey rolls onto his stomach and props his head up on his folded arms. “You'll have to teach me more mind stuff.”
Gerard smiles. “I will. You might even be able to communicate with Frank, since we share blood.”
“I like Frank,” Mikey says. “I just don't know if I want to be that close to him.”
“He likes you, too,” Gerard says.
Mikey is silent for a moment, his mind pulling back a little so that he can think in private.
“What is it?” Gerard asks.
“You're in love with him,” Mikey says.
Gerard nods. “I am.”
“And you're in love with me,” Mikey points out.
“Totally and completely,” Gerard whispers, kissing Mikey's forehead.
Mikey nods slowly. “What would happen if I fell in love with Frank?”
“Do you think that's possible?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I like him. He's cool. And he's really hot.”
Gerard smiles and sends Mikey a mental picture of the first time he met Frank. Mikey takes the image and looks it over, smiling a little.
“He was beautiful then, but in a different way,” Mikey says. “He looks weird without the tattoos and piercings.”
“And the hair,” Gerard says. Frank has never grown his hair out quite as long as it was when they first met.
“It's hard to believe he's so old,” Mikey says. “I mean, he seems so … modern, you know?”
“If a vampire doesn't change with the times, he goes a little insane,” Gerard says, thinking of Azrael.
“How have you changed?” Mikey asks.
Gerard looks at the ceiling and thinks. “When I was human, I was very religious. I wanted to be a priest at one point.”
Mikey laughs softly. “I can't see that.”
“Well, I did. I wanted to help people, and to serve my God,” Gerard says.
“Do you believe in God now?” Mikey asks curiously.
Gerard sighs. “After I was turned, I lost my faith. My sire drilled into my head that existence is temporary and random, that humans are nothing but animals, and when they die merely crumble to dust. He taught me that humans have no souls, that vampires are the closest things to gods, and that we could live without repercussions.”
“But now...”
“Now I know he was wrong. About everything,” Gerard says.
“And God?” Mikey asks.
Gerard smiles. “I believe there is Someone out there. I carry memories of worshiping gods of nature and force, and gods of emotion and intellect. I... I don't know what is out there, but I think the nature of God is something humans and vampires cannot know. We just make up stories that make sense to us because the real thing is beyond our ken.”
“I believe,” Mikey says. He closes his eyes and Gerard can feel him searching for buried memories, for flashes of images from a long time past. Gerard adds the strength of his mind to Mikey's, helping him find what he is looking for.
Mikey gasps as the first memory is uncovered.
“Slowly,” Gerard murmurs. “Don't take on too much at once.”
Mikey nods and then carefully turns over a bright, dreamlike image. The sun shines on brightly colored flowers and a light breeze musses his curls. He holds a silver spoon in his hands and he is digging into the nearly-black dirt. The dirt is cool against his hands and damp, and he uncovers a pale, wriggling earthworm. He picks it up with chubby fingers.
Mother is going to be so angry, dream-Gerard says. You've taken her best silver and you're filthy now.
Wormy? Michael says, holding up his treasure.
Gerard's frown transforms into a smile as he watches his baby brother. It's a lovely worm, Michael.
Michael smiles back and clasps the worm tightly in his hand. Then he reaches out, offering it to Gerard. For you.
Gerard takes the earthworm carefully. Love and affection shine in his eyes. Thank you very much, good sir.
Good sir, good sir! Michael sing-songs.
The memory ends, leaving them both with a feeling as warm as the summer sun.
“He adored you,” Mikey says.
“And I felt the same in return,” Gerard says, and carefully finds the right memory to share.
He is nearly still a baby himself. Mother is propped up in the bed, looking worn but happy. Gerard climbs onto the bed carefully, because Father said Mother is still weak and isn't to overexert herself.
Mother is holding a blanket. No, there's something in the blanket. Is it a present? Why is it in a blanket? Why does mother look so tired?
Come here and see your baby brother, Mother says.
Gerard has heard this word brother before, but he doesn't know what it means. He knows what a baby is, though. He used to be a baby. There's been a baby in Mother's tummy for ages.
Mother moves the blanket so Gerard can see inside. A small face is revealed. It is red and scrunched, its nose flat. Two eyes gaze up at nothing, dark blue and unfocused.
Gerard frowns as he looks down at the baby. Surely he was never so small.
May I hold it? Gerard asks.
Him, not it, Mother says. And his name is Michael.
Impatiently, Gerard asks again. May I hold him?
Mother nods. Sit back on the pillow and fold your legs. Look at how I hold him, do you see how I support his head? You have to be very careful with his head because his neck is not strong.
It's a lot of words at once for Gerard, but he struggles to understand. Babies are weak and breakable. He has to be careful.
Gerard holds his arms like Mother shows him, then watches as the baby is settled into them. The baby is so light and small. Gerard isn't sure he likes it. Him. But he feels good in Gerard's arms, warm and alive.
Then the baby does a curious thing. He looks up, and for a moment his eyes focus, meeting Gerard's. The baby stares, and Gerard feels something strange turn over in his heart.
Brother, Gerard says to the baby. To Michael. You're my brother.
And you are his, Mother says gently.
Gerard watches the baby seriously. Understanding enters his mind. They are brothers, and brothers mean they belong to each other.
You'll have to protect him sometimes, Mother says. And love him with all of your heart. Don't become jealous or angry with him, because he's just a baby and doesn't know any better.
Gerard only understands some of that. Protect, that is what he does to his wooden toys to keep them from being taken by others. He can protect. Love is what he feels for Mother, though he gets angry with her sometimes when she won't let him play, or when she sends him away from her. He doesn't know what jealous means.
Mine, Gerard whispers to baby Michael. You're all mine.
The baby keeps looking up into Gerard's face, eyes large and dark. And for the first time in his life, Gerard doesn't feel alone.
He lets the memory fade, and when he opens his eyes, Mikey is looking at him with a wide, vulnerable look. Gerard can see himself through Mikey's eyes, like a distorted mirror. Distorted because Mikey does not see Gerard in the way he sees himself.
Mikey sees Gerard as a shining, beautiful creature. His eyes are larger, his hair softer, his lips fuller. Darkness covers Gerard's aura like a shroud of lace, enticing and safe. Gerard rebels against this image with a frown, sending his own picture of himself. He is scarred from his past, and his darkness is dangerous. His heart is just now healing, only able to love again through others' intervention. Without them, he is cold and black inside, lacking kindness and understanding.
Mikey shakes his head. “Maybe you were like that once,” he says. “But now you're something different. You've... evolved.”
Painfully, Gerard lets his darkest memories surface. Mikey looks at them. Gerard expects him to feel shock, confusion, or betrayal. But Mikey examines them in a detached way – no, not detached. He is accepting. He skims over the memories, then turns them over to look at the bottom, to feel the emotions. He doesn't find many. Gerard was lonely and confused, eager to please his sire, but he felt little besides that.
Mikey sighs tiredly. “You've changed.”
Gerard can feel his weariness and pulls back from Mikey's mind. He holds him close and kisses his hair. “Sleep. All this mind magic has made you tired.”
“Is it magic, really?” Mikey asks. He blinks sleepily into Gerard's face, curious.
“That's what Brian calls it. Azrael always called it an art.”
“I think I'll call it magic, too,” Mikey says, closing his eyes.
“Sleep,” Gerard says again. The sunrise is still hours away, and he can hold Mikey like this until it's time for him to go.
Mikey drifts off, his breath becoming even. An hour later, Frank slips into the bed and looks at Mikey's claim mark.
He's beautiful, Frank sends, careful not to wake Mikey with a whisper.
How was your date? Gerard asks.
Frank grins and lays back on the bed, his arms beneath his head. I could fall in love with Ray.
A feeling pricks at Gerard's heart. Not jealousy. He's happy for Frank. But something that feels like loss twinges in his chest.
Frank looks at him in understanding. I will always be your childe.
Gerard reaches out for his hand and twines their fingers together. Will you leave me?
Love and devotion floods Gerard's mind as Frank sends him all his emotions. Has Brian left you?
Gerard shakes his head. Even though he hasn't seen Brian in decades, he can still feel him with him. His soul lingers, their love preserving the connection.
But still, Gerard does not want Frank to go. I don't want to live without you.
He can feel Frank turn this over in his mind. Finally, he sends, Then all of us will live together.
Gerard can't help but laugh. You and me, Mikey and Ray? The solution seems so simple, and yet anything but easy.
Eventually. We have all the time in the world, Frank says. His mind is bright and hopeful with possibility.
Gerard watches Mikey sleep, watches the even movements of his chest as he breathes. One day, Mikey will have no more need for breath. One day, they will share the same blood again.
One day.
“We're going to need a bigger bed,” Gerard whispers, and Frank can't contain his laughter.
The End.
*
Present Day
“Are you coming to my show tonight?” Frank asks.
Gerard would rather stay in and paint or read comic books, but Frank is so excited about playing in a 'real live band' that he can't possibly say no to his adopted childe. “Okay.”
Frank lights up like a Christmas tree. “It's gonna be fucking awesome.”
Gerard smiles at the modern way Frank talks now. He should be used to it, but sometimes he hears echoes of Frank's accent – now thoroughly American – and marvels. His own accent has softened as well; traveling and living in America for fifty years will do that.
“What time do we have to be there?” Gerard asks.
“We're leaving now,” Frank says. “Hurry up and get dressed.”
Dressing in the twenty-first century is so much easier. All Gerard has to do is slip on a pair of jeans, grab a tee-shirt and jacket, and lace up his boots. Frank watches him, impatience emanating from him thickly.
“All right, all right, I'm ready,” Gerard says, smiling at him.
They run hand in hand to the club. It's always fun to run with Frank, who loves to move and exert his power. The stretch their legs and Frank runs as fast as he can, and Gerard matches his pace.
The club is small and crowded, and Gerard slips off to skulk in the shadows. It's his thing, his vampire thing. He can watch Frank just as well from the wall as he can from up close. He has preternatural sight and hearing, after all.
He watches the dancers, vaguely aware of the hunger he feels. He should feed while he's here. He likes watching the kids who come to Frank's shows. They move with reckless abandon, smelling like salt and sex. Their heartbeats pound, and Gerard can hear them above the music. He knows Frank can, too, that their beating hearts move him.
Frank flails on the stage, playing his heart out. Gerard is so proud of him for finding something he loves to do.
Gerard slips through the crowd when he finds his target. She's got black hair and black eyes, pale skin like a vampire herself. Gerard touches her mind as he touches her arm, then pulls her back along the wall.
She arches against him in pleasure when he bites down. He can hear her soft gasp and low moan. He slips his thigh between her legs so she has something to move against if she wants.
He feels eyes on him. Not Frank's, but someone else's. Someone human. He reaches out, feeling with his mind, still drinking from the club girl. His intention is to wipe a memory, but the mind he finds is painfully familiar.
Gerard licks the girl's neck healed and turns his head. There, staring at him, are eyes he would recognize anywhere.
Michael.
On stage, Frank misses a chord and whips around towards Gerard and Michael. The rest of the band messes up and stops playing. The entire club complains.
Still, Gerard stares at Michael.
His hair is different, his cheekbones higher, his eyes lighter than the brown Gerard remembers. His clothes are tight and thin, showing off more of his body than Gerard remembers ever seeing. No, that's not right. His mind flashes to images of Mihaitus, swimming naked in a pond with him. He can feel his body beneath him and over him, and he has to close his eyes.
When he opens them again, Michael is gone.
Frank tells the crowd they're taking a break and joins Gerard. “I heard right?”
Gerard looks around frantically. “He was here. I just saw him, and then he disappeared.”
“Okay, okay. We'll find him,” Frank says, trying to calm him. But Gerard can't calm down; he just saw his brother for the first time in centuries.
Gerard sends a picture of Michael to Frank's mind. Frank nods and goes one way while Gerard goes the other. They'll find him.
Michael isn't in the club. They go outside and look around, but still find no sign of him.
“He saw me feed,” Gerard says. “It must have scared him.”
But Michael hadn't looked scared. His face had been unreadable – blank. The only thing Gerard saw any emotion in was his eyes, and even those were hard to read.
A bus rolls by, and Gerard curses. Michael could be miles away by now if he had a car. They'll never find him. Not unless he comes back to the club.
“We'll find him,” Frank says again, wrapping an arm around Gerard's waist. Gerard leans on him and closes his eyes.
“We have to,” Gerard says. “He's... he's everything.”
“I know,” Frank says.
“Did you recognize him?” Gerard asks. “Have you seen him before?”
“No,” Frank says. “I'm sorry.”
“Fuck,” Gerard swears quietly. Then he punches the alley wall. His fist cracks through the brick and mortar, and he feels his bones crunch.
“Don't do that,” Frank says, grabbing his hand. Even as he does, Gerard feels the bones knitting back into place. It hurts but he doesn't care. Frank pulls him close, hugging him tightly.
“At least I know...” Gerard begins to say. He knows his general vicinity – a medium-sized town in Jersey. He knows what he looks like. He knows, he finally knows, that Michael lives.
*
Gerard stalks the club every night after he sees Michael. He leans back against the wall, scanning the crowd, watching everyone who goes in or out.
When he's not at the club, he paints. He paints furiously, trying to capture Michael's soul on canvas. The paintings are a mixture of old and new Michael; on some of the canvases he wears a toga, on some he wears linen shirts, hose, and breeches.
And then there are the more modern paintings, where Michael is wearing jeans and a band shirt. Gerard has to work hard on these, getting them just right. He only saw him for a moment, just a glimpse, so he can't quite get it.
He loses sleep, dreaming restlessly during the day and waking hours before Frank to paint and pace.
“Maybe you should check some of the other clubs,” Frank says one night.
“No,” Gerard says. “He'll come back to this one.”
“Do you think he'll be drawn to you?” Frank asks. “Do you think he'll remember?”
“I don't know,” Gerard murmurs. But how could Michael not be drawn to him? Gerard's soul cries out for Michael's. Surely he feels the same.
“Why don't you take a picture of one of your paintings and show it around?” Frank suggests. “Maybe someone knows him.”
Gerard frowns at his latest creation. Michael's jeans are faded and slung low on his hips, and Gerard can see the hint of skin right below the hem of his shirt. In a different age, it would be obscene. Now, the sight makes Gerard's throat tighten.
“That one will work,” Frank says, and whips out his phone to take a picture. “I'll ask people, too. If he's a regular on the scene, we'll find him.”
“We'll find him no matter what,” Gerard murmurs, taking a picture of his own.
“He looks young. Probably still in high school,” Frank says.
“You look young yourself,” Gerard says with a smile.
Frank makes a face and gives Gerard a hug. “I'll ask everyone I see if they know him.”
Gerard hugs back fiercely. “Good luck.”
“You too,” Frank whispers.
*
The tiny club is having another all-ages night, which gives Gerard hope. The band that plays is good. They rile the crowd and get it jumping.
“Have you seen my brother?” Gerard asks again and again, showing the picture around.
There are a couple of nods, but no one knows anything for certain. Gerard searches their minds for a name, a place, anything.
Mikey, the bartender knows. Mikey Way.
Gerard's breath catches in his throat. They have the same surname. Perhaps, far back, they are related. If Michael is a descendant of the Ways who left England in Gerard's time, that would make them cousins, of a sort.
But Michael will always be Gerard's baby brother, of this he is sure.
It goes faster after that. He has a name. “Do you know my brother? Michael... Mikey Way?”
The younger the patrons in the club, he finds, the more likely they are to have met Michael in the past. One girl says, “Mikey, sure. He's in my Latin class.”
Gerard feels excitement well up in him. “Do you know where he lives?”
The girl shrugs. “Never asked. I've seen him at Dante's a lot, though.”
Dante's is another club. All this time, Gerard should have been searching somewhere else. But this is a good lead.
“Where do you go to school?” he asks, compelling her to answer truthfully.
“Belleville High,” she answers easily.
“Thank you,” Gerard murmurs, and thralls her just enough that she'll follow him outside. He feeds from her quickly, eager to find Michael.
He heads to Dante's. Now that he's fed, he can use the rest of the night to hunt for his brother.
Dante's is an all-ages club, filled with high school kids dressed in tight clothes. It only takes one sweep of the club to find that Michael isn't there. So Gerard begins to ask around, and finds that his brother was there earlier, but went home. No one knows exactly where he lives.
“Hey, I hear you're looking for Mikey,” someone says, tapping Gerard on the back. Gerard turns around and sees a girl of about sixteen. She has dark eye makeup and long black hair.
“Yes,” Gerard says. “Do you know where he lives?”
The girl narrows her eyes at him suspiciously. “Who wants to know?”
Gerard smiles and presses on her mind. “I'm his brother.”
She shakes her head as if to clear it. “Mikey's an only child,” she says hesitantly.
“We've been apart for some time,” Gerard says. In her mind, he sees an old but well-kept brick house on the edge of town. “Thank you.”
She rolls her eyes. “Don't you want to know more?”
Gerard smiles. “I don't need any more. You've been very helpful.”
He leaves her standing there confused.
*
The house is easy to find, and Gerard gets there before Michael does. He watches from the shadows as Michael parks and gets out of his car. He touches his mind and Michael looks up towards where Gerard is hiding.
“Hello?” Michael calls. His voice is even, unafraid. Gerard's heart turns over at the sound.
Michael takes a few steps forward, then shakes his head and mutters something under his breath. He walks back towards the house and goes inside.
Gerard crouches in the bushes beside the house and looks inside. Michael's mother is there waiting up for him, and she smiles when she sees him. He gives her a kiss on the cheek and then opens the refrigerator. Gerard watches him, the easy slump of his shoulders and the graceful movement of his limbs. It's painfully familiar. Mother always scolded Michael for slouching, but he did it anyway. The sight of it now is almost too great for Gerard to bear. But still, he watches, memorizing the lines of Michael's new body.
He's taller now, possibly taller than Gerard himself. His hair is darker, not the pale blond of Michael's childhood. His eyes are lighter, he noticed before. Hazel now instead of brown. Not quite as light as Frank's, but close.
Gerard watches as Michael goes upstairs. His mother follows, presumably to her own bedroom.
Gerard waits.
The house is quiet, but he can hear their heartbeats and their small sighs as they sleep. He finds a key under a flower pot by the back door and lets himself in. Quietly, he pads upstairs. He follows the scent of teenaged boy to a half-closed door.
He feels like a voyeur as he watches Michael sleep. He touches his mind, sees his dreams. He closes his eyes and slips in, unseen.
But he sees himself. Michael has been dreaming of him and that night at the club. In his waking hours, Gerard sees, Michael has almost convinced himself that he imagined it. But here in his dreams, he relives the moment.
There is Gerard, leaning over the girl. He can't see his face, only the back of his head. Michael – no, he calls himself Mikey in his mind – watches with interest. Then Gerard turns around and-
Fangs. Blood. Red eyes. But Mikey isn't frightened by the sight. Why isn't he scared? Gerard moves through Mikey's mind and sees that he's trapped in the moment, unable to move under Gerard's gaze. There's something familiar there, something Mikey feels deep in his bones. Or maybe his veins.
The scene shifts, and Gerard watches Mikey's imagination take flight. He is laid bare beneath Gerard, his neck exposed. Gerard holds him down and lunges for his throat.
Back in his bedroom, Mikey stirs and slides a hand beneath the covers. Gerard goes very still as Mikey begins to stroke himself in his sleep. He tentatively reaches out with his mind, feeling Mikey's need. He swallows hard as the scent of lust fills the small room.
Mikey moans in his sleep, stroking faster. In his dream, Gerard feeds from him, biting down harder and rocking against him.
Mikey orgasms, and the scent of his come overwhelms Gerard. He feels sick for watching, ashamed and excited at the same time. This is his brother.
But Mikey has also been his lover. In another life, they were even closer than Gerard can remember of this lifetime, twins who knew each other's greatest fears and desires. Perhaps they were together in other lifetimes as well.
He longs to taste Mikey's blood and remember.
Mikey rolls onto his side and falls into a deeper sleep. Gerard moves closer, smooth and soundless. He leans down and presses a kiss to Mikey's forehead, then breathes in the scent of his hair.
He smells like sunshine after a storm. Like hope.
*
“I found him,” Gerard says to Frank. The dawn is approaching, else he would still be watching over Mikey.
Frank touches Gerard's mind and reaches for memories. Gerard gives them up easily, used to sharing everything with Frank.
“He's not your brother in this lifetime,” Frank reminds him gently. “You have to … I don't know, woo him.”
Gerard laughs. “I don't know how to woo someone.”
“You'd better learn, and stop being a creepy creepster who breaks into houses and watches underaged boys masturbate,” Frank says.
Gerard sobers. “Don't say it like that, it was... an accident. I didn't mean to see that.”
“And yet you didn't leave when you saw what was going on,” Frank says. He wraps his arms around Gerard's waist and presses against him. “Horny?”
“You know I am,” Gerard says.
“Then do me,” Frank says with a waggle of his eyebrows.
Gerard pulls at Frank's shirt and lifts it up over his head, exposing smooth, tattooed skin. He presses him to the bed and unzips his jeans. Frank lifts his hips and lets Gerard slide them down his legs. Frank isn't wearing any underwear.
“How do you want me?” Frank asks.
“I want to suck you off,” Gerard says, “and then I'm going to fuck you.”
Frank beams at him. “You always have the best ideas.”
Gerard strips down until he's bare, then climbs between Frank's legs. He licks Frank's length, teasing and light, and laughs when Frank complains. Gerard swallows him down suddenly, making Frank arch up off the bed. He sucks voraciously, jacking him with his hand as he does.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Gerard,” Frank gasps, slipping a hand into his hair.
Gerard touches his mind and sends a burst of amusement along the connection. Frank flips him off and thrusts into his mouth.
Frank continues thrusting, fucking Gerard's mouth until he comes, gasping and pulling Gerard's hair. He's always extra sensitive after he comes, and Gerard touches him gently, rolling him onto his stomach.
He fucks him smoothly, hard enough to break a human but just right for a vampire. Frank's hands clench in the sheets and he moans, pushing back on Gerard's cock.
Gerard is thinking of nothing but Frank when he comes, although afterward his mind wanders back to Mikey.
“How do I woo him?” he asks. “I've never dated anyone before, I have no idea how to do it.”
“You should try talking to him,” Frank says sleepily. “Find out what you have in common.”
“Besides our past lives?” Gerard asks sardonically.
“You should leave out that part,” Frank says. “And the part where you're a bloodsucking creature of the night.”
“I think he's already figured that much out,” Gerard says.
“Gee, go to sleep,” Frank says, closing his eyes. “You have eternity to figure this shit out.”
“He's human. I don't have that long,” Gerard says testily.
“Oh c'mon, lighten up,” Frank says. He pillows his head on Gerard's chest and smacks his shoulder. “Think about it tomorrow night.”
Gerard growls playfully and nuzzles Frank's hair. “All right. I'll rest.”
“Not like you have a choice,” Frank yawns.
The sun comes up and the force of it pulls Gerard down into sleep.
*
Gerard follows Michael from his house to Dante's. It's Friday night, and Gerard has waited almost a week to see him again. He's been overly patient, he thinks. It's time for them to meet properly.
Michael goes into the club and Gerard follows at a distance. Gerard touches his mind lightly as he meets with his friends.
He stiffens and looks around. Somehow, he's felt Gerard's mental intrusion. He doesn't know where it comes from, though.
One of Michael's friends looks at Gerard and frowns, then leans in close to Michael and whispers something.
Michael freezes and turns around, looking straight at Gerard. Gerard nods and his brother's face pales. No, not his brother. This isn't Michael, not exactly.
Come here, Mikey, Gerard sends gently, leaning against the fall wall of the club. It's shadowed here and relatively quiet.
Mikey shakes his head and looks down, then looks up again, unable to keep his eyes from Gerard. Mikey whispers something to a friend, still not looking away, and begins to walk closer.
His entire body is tense, his instincts screaming Danger! in his mind. But Mikey isn't a coward. Against his fear, he walks on. He comes closer, until Gerard could just reach out and touch him. He doesn't though, not yet. Mikey is spooked enough already.
Mikey stops in front of him, looking into his eyes. Gerard nods again.
“I'm Gerard,” he says.
Mikey swallows and licks his bottom lip nervously. “You're a vampire,” he says, his voice soft but even. If Gerard wasn't touching his mind, he would have thought him calm.
Gerard smiles and leans back more, giving the impression of total relaxation. He wants Mikey to let down his guard, but he knows it won't be that easy.
“I am,” Gerard says. “But it's a secret.” On the small stage, a band starts playing. Gerard smiles and holds out his hand to Mikey. “Dance?”
Mikey shakes his head no even as he reaches out to take Gerard's hand. His eyes are narrow and distrustful, but Gerard curls his fingers around his and pulls him onto the dance floor.
Gerard knows how to dance, he just doesn't do it very often anymore. But he's seen Frank move enough to know just how to do it. He places his hands at Mikey's hips – gently, not as possessively as he'd like – and pulls him close.
They move together to the music, and Gerard once again touches Mikey's mind. Mikey's breath comes sharp and he thinks, What is he doing to my head?
Relax, Gerard sends. Just dance.
Mikey shakes his head as if to dislodge Gerard's mind. “Don't do that,” he says softly. “It creeps me out.”
“Talk to you mind to mind?” Gerard asks.
“Don't do anything with my mind,” Mikey says. “I don't like thinking there's more than me in my head.”
Gerard leans forward and murmurs in his ear. “I'd never hurt you.”
“Forgive me if I don't believe you,” Mikey says back in a monotone. Then, “What do you want with me?”
Gerard hesitates to answer. He can't give Mikey the truth, but he answers as best he can. “I like you, Mikey Way.”
“You don't even know me,” Mikey says.
“What I know is good,” Gerard says. “And I'd like to get to know you better.”
Mikey bites his lip and nods slowly. “Just don't kill me, okay?”
Gerard smiles and pulls Mikey closer against him. He can feel the beat of his heart in his chest and smell his shampoo under his sweat. “I won't,” he promises.
Mikey mutters, “A fucking vampire,” under his breath, but doesn't pull away. He lets Gerard dance close to him, and he begins to move with the music again.
When the band's set ends, Gerard buys Mikey a cold soda and offers to walk him home.
“I drove,” Mikey says. “And I doubt my mom would want me bringing home an older man. She's not that understanding.”
“What time do you have to be home?” Gerard asks. Mikey looks at his watch and says, “In an hour.”
“Oh. Maybe tomorrow night you could come to my place. You could meet Frank,” Gerard says, excited at the idea.
“Who's Frank?” Mikey asks.
Gerard hesitates. How to describe his relationship to Frank to someone who doesn't understand vampire relationships? He settles with, “Frank's my childe.”
“Your childe. You mean you made him a vampire?” Mikey asks.
Gerard nods.
“Are you... together?” Mikey asks.
“We've been together for almost two hundred years,” Gerard says.
Mikey pulls away a little and studies Gerard's face. “That's not what I meant.”
“It's hard to explain,” Gerard says. “He's family.”
“And more,” Mikey says. “Don't try to lie to me. What do you want me for?”
“Pardon?” Gerard says.
Mikey snorts. “If you have Frank already, what do you want me for? Or are you just greedy?”
“You want me, too,” Gerard murmurs.
“Stay out of my mind,” Mikey says.
“Come have dinner with us tomorrow night. I'll pick you up,” Gerard says.
“I can drive,” Mikey answers. “Give me your address.”
Gerard does. Mikey says he'll arrive when the sun goes down.
“I still don't know what you want with me, but I'm curious enough to go along with it,” Mikey says.
“How old are you?” Gerard asks.
“Seventeen,” Mikey says. “Why? Too young for you?”
It's old enough to die, older than Michael was when the plague took him. Gerard has a sudden fear that something will happen to Mikey. He shakes his head and looks away. “Stay safe, okay?”
Mikey gives him a strange look, but nods slowly. Music from the DJ blares through the speakers.
They dance silently after that, moving together, pressed against one another, and Gerard can sense Mikey's arousal as a slow burning fire. It would be so easy to stoke it, to make Mikey burn for him, but Gerard knows he should go slowly else he will chase Mikey away. He doesn't want to scare him.
After the dance, Gerard pulls away, dragging his eyes from Mikey's long neck. “You have to go.”
Mikey nods and then impulsively kisses Gerard's cheek. When he pulls back, he is flushed.
Gerard watches Mikey leave, then goes home himself. Frank is still out and the large house is quiet. Gerard misses his Court sometimes, the company of humans and vampires living together. He doesn't miss the responsibility, though. He has enough to worry about in his life.
He goes through the mail, sorting through bills and advertisements. Among the plain white envelopes is one that is different. It is made of folded parchment and sealed with black wax. There is no return address.
Gerard opens the letter carefully, recognizing the handwriting at once.
My Dearest Childe,
With a heavy heart, I must tell you of your Grandsire's death. A mob of humans attacked his Court while they slept. I was out in the countryside on an errand at the time, and came back a night later to find Selim and the rest of the Court burned to death.
Those responsible have been punished.
I find myself in Greece again. It is not the same without your companionship. Please come and rid me of my loneliness.
Your affectionate Sire,
Azrael
Gerard shakes his head in denial. He can't leave Mikey. He won't. Azrael will have to deal with his 'loneliness' himself.
“What's that?” Frank says from behind him. Gerard turns, surprised.
“I didn't hear you come in,” he says. “I didn't even feel you.”
Frank grins. “I'm working on shielding.”
“Well you're getting pretty good at it,” Gerard says, proud of his adopted childe.
“What has you in a tizzy?” Frank asks, taking the letter from Gerard's hands. He reads silently, then whistles low. “What are you going to do?”
Gerard shakes his head. “Write back and say I can't come, I guess. It isn't an order.”
“It sounds like it's pretty close to an order to me,” Frank says. “Although he does say 'please'.”
Gerard burns the letter in the fireplace.
“How did he find you, anyway?” Frank asks.
“I'm sure he has his ways,” Gerard murmurs. He watches the letter curl in on itself and burn. “Michael – Mikey – is coming for dinner tomorrow night.”
“I hope you're not cooking,” Frank says.
“We're not letting you near the kitchen,” Gerard says.
“I only set a fire maybe once. Or twice,” Frank says defensively.
Gerard smiles. “We'll get someone to come in and cook,” he says. “I think I know just the right person. Call Ray?”
Frank smiles and gets out his phone, scrolling through his contacts. He calls and offers Ray a scandalous amount of money to cook the next day. Gerard can hear Ray's voice answer back in excitement as he says yes.
Frank puts his phone away again and says, “I think he has a crush on me.”
“Ray?” Gerard says. He thinks for a moment, remembers the shy glances and flushing cheeks. “I think he has a crush on us both.”
“Can I have him?” Frank asks. “I've never had a pet before.”
Gerard laughs. “I think Ray would be more than just a pet,” he says. He's touched Ray's mind, seen the fierce intelligence and honesty there. He would be loyal, too, something that Frank values highly.
Frank nods, hearing Gerard's thoughts. “I'll flirt with him a little tomorrow night.”
Gerard laughs again. Frank's flirting is not a subtle thing.
“I can be subtle,” Frank pouts. “He plays guitar, too. We can talk about music. So when is Mikey coming?”
“He'll be here an hour after sunset,” Gerard says.
They go to bed, and Gerard talks softly about his night. Frank touches his mind to fill in the blanks, nodding as he does.
“He is frightened, but he wants you,” Frank says.
“I want him to love me,” Gerard admits. “I want him to remember.”
“You'll have to go slowly with him,” Frank tells him. “Get to know each other. Show him you're more than just a hungry vampire. He wants the danger, yes, but...”
“I want him to want me for myself,” Gerard says.
“He will. Give him time,” Frank says. Then he moves into Gerard's arms and says, “I will have to go slowly with Ray, as well. He doesn't know what we are. I don't want to scare him away.”
He nuzzles Gerard's neck, mouthing the skin there. Gerard tips his head back for him and says, “Go ahead.”
“I always want you,” Frank whispers, then bites down. He sucks at Gerard's blood, slow and shallow. He doesn't take more than a few mouthfuls before he pulls back and licks over the marks he's made.
Gerard can feel Frank's hardness, so he wraps a hand around his cock and begins to stroke. Frank moans and kisses him, then straddles his waist.
Gerard's cock presses against Frank's ass as he rocks against him. He doesn't want to fuck, not right now when dawn is so close upon them. This is enough.
Frank pushes into Gerard's hand and says, “Faster, Sire.”
Gerard complies and strokes him the way he likes, hard and rough. He leans up and kisses him again, hard and demanding. Possessive, even after all these years.
Their minds entwine, feeding off one another. Frank comes, gasping Gerard's name. Then he slides down and takes Gerard's cock into his mouth.
Frank sucks cock like he does everything else – with overwhelming enthusiasm. Gerard is bucking up into his mouth after only a few moments, groaning and sliding his hands into Frank's hair.
Frank looks up at him, a smile in his eyes. Come down my throat. I know you want to. He sends Gerard obscene images, some of them hardly realistic. Gerard sends an image back, that of what he's seeing now: Frank looking up at him with dark eyes, taking his cock between stretched lips, looking completely debauched and beautiful.
Gerard comes, his cock spurting into Frank's mouth. Frank swallows, moaning happily, then licks up what he missed. Gerard thinks Frank lets it dribble down his chin on purpose, just so his sire will lick it from his face. Gerard pulls him up, dragging his tongue from Frank's neck to his lips, then kisses him messily.
Frank nearly purrs in contentment. They rolls onto their sides and face each other, Gerard tracing his fingers over Frank's cheek lightly.
“I love you, childe,” he whispers.
Frank smiles and closes his eyes. “Love you, too. So much.”
They fall asleep with their arms wrapped around each other, just as they do most nights. The years together have only deepened their feelings for each other, pulled them together so that nothing could part them.
As Gerard falls asleep, he remembers back to when he couldn't love. He remembers his fierce anger, his unquenchable desire for violence and bloodshed. He's changed much over the centuries, and Frank has been a big part of his evolution. Now he even cares for humans, in his own way.
And this is the main reason he doesn't want to see Azrael. His sire doesn't have a touch of humanity in him, and he taught Gerard to be the same way. Gerard knows he'll be disappointed, perhaps even angry, at the way Gerard treats humans now.
Gerard no longer kills innocents. He respects humans and feeds from them carefully, keeping pain to a minimum. He gives them happy thoughts when they part, vague memories of pleasure and affection. He doesn't seek to incite fear, no matter how delicious it is. This respect goes against everything Azrael taught him.
He still feels affection for his sire, but the connection is weak. He doesn't know if he likes Azrael anymore. For the most part, he pities him.
He dreams of his turning and the times immediately after. He tosses in his sleep, feeling the pain and anguish of the humans he murdered for decades under Azrael's tutelage. He is vaguely aware of Frank holding him tightly, touching his mind and sending waves of love.
When he wakes, the sun is low in the sky, nearly set. He feels guilt. Frank is awake, watching him silently.
“I don't deserve to have Michael,” Gerard whispers.
Frank rolls his eyes and slaps him on the shoulder. “You're not the same person anymore.”
“Yes, I am. I still feel the urge to kill sometimes. I-”
“But you don't,” Frank says. “I know; I watched you change. You're different. Your heart is different.”
Gerard shakes his head. “Is it enough to make up for what I did in the past?”
“Do you think you can ever make it up to those you killed? It's impossible,” Frank says, and Gerard's heart sinks. “But you've turned yourself around. You've saved humans in the past. You treat them with dignity now, even when you don't have to.”
“Ray's downstairs,” Gerard says. He needs time to mull over Frank's words. “Go on down and flirt.”
Frank grins and gets dressed in a hurry, then practically flies out of the room. If Gerard wanted to, he could listen in on the conversation. He leaves them alone, though, dressing himself and thinking about Mikey.
Would Mikey accept him if he knew about all the people Gerard has killed? Probably not. It's just another thing to hide from him.
*
Mikey arrives promptly at 9:11, an hour after sunset. “I checked online for sunset times,” he says.
Gerard is oddly touched by the gesture. “Thank you,” he says, leading Mikey into the dining room. Ray is there, setting out the food. Frank is standing near him, and he grins widely as they enter the room.
“Mikey Way, I'd like to introduce Frank Iero. Frank, this is Mikey,” Gerard says almost formally. “And the gentleman who prepared our food is Ray Toro. Ray, this looks delicious.”
“I didn't know vampires ate real food,” Mikey murmurs softly. Ray must hear him, because he looks confused.
Gerard looks at Frank, and Frank takes the hint. Ray's eyes go slightly glassy as he exits the room, Frank on his heels.
“What was that?” Mikey asks.
“Oh. Ray doesn't know we're vampires,” Gerard explains. “Frank wants to break it to him gently.”
“Not really a gentle way to put it, is there? I mean, 'I suck blood' is pretty...”
Gerard looks at him as he trails off. “You aren't running away.”
“I did at first,” Mikey points out.
“But now you aren't,” Gerard says. “I could be evil. I could want to kill you.”
“Not inspiring a lot of confidence there, dude,” Mikey says, but Gerard can tell he's mostly joking, even though his voice stays soft and serious.
Gerard smiles. “I don't kill humans for no good reason,” he says. Not anymore, he thinks.
“What would you call a good reason?” Mikey asks curiously.
“If they threatened someone I loved,” Gerard says slowly. “I can be very protective.”
Mikey shivers even though the room is warm.
“Sit down and eat,” Gerard says. “I don't want all this food going to waste.”
“Will Frank be joining us?” Mikey asks, taking a seat. Gerard sits beside him at the head of the table.
“He's busy flirting with Ray right now,” Gerard says with a smile. The snippets of conversation he catches are amusing. Frank is close to just getting naked and offering himself. Subtlety is not his strong suit.
“You don't mind?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pours wine into their glasses and shakes his head. “Why would I mind? They like each other.”
“You aren't jealous?” Mikey presses.
“Frank and I are... solid. Unshakable. We've been together a long time,” Gerard explains, picking up his fork.
“Are you bored of him? Is that why you're after me?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pauses with his fork halfway to his mouth. “I don't think I will ever be bored of Frank. Once you get to know him you'll understand.”
“So... why? Why me?” Mikey asks.
“You're special,” Gerard says simply.
“I'm not,” Mikey denies. “I'm just me.”
Gerard smiles softly and chews his food. Then he says, “You're special to me. That is all you need to know.”
Mikey gives him a dubious look and takes a bite of his own food. It's a chicken fajita with Spanish rice, done to perfection. Gerard enjoys his own, reminding himself to pay Ray a handsome tip on top of the money he's been promised.
“So... vampires eat?” Mikey asks.
“Sometimes,” Gerard says. “I don't need to, but I can and do occasionally. Usually when I want to share dinner with someone. It's only polite. You wouldn't want me to sit and stare at you while you ate, would you?”
Mikey huffs and smiles. “No, that'd be pretty creepy.”
Gerard is reminded of Frank's comment from the week before, that Gerard was a 'creepy creepster' who broke into houses and watched underaged boys masturbate. If he could blush, he would be crimson right now.
“When will you be eighteen?” Gerard asks.
“Jailbait until September tenth,” Mikey says, smiling a little. “Do you mind?”
Michael's birthday was in the spring. Gerard remembers holding him when he was an infant, vowing to protect him. It happened lifetimes ago, but Gerard remembers it clearly.
“You're old enough to know what you want,” Gerard says. “In my day, you became a man at fourteen.”
“When was that? What year were you born?” Mikey asks.
Gerard waves the question away. “Does it matter?”
“I want to know just how much older than me you are,” Mikey says.
“I was twenty in sixteen sixty-five,” Gerard says, unknowingly echoing what he once told Frank. “And twenty forever after.”
Mikey stares at him, blinking. Gerard touches his mind and finds a tempest of questions and insecurities.
“It's okay,” Gerard says. “You aren't too young, neither are you too naïve. You're perfect to me, just the way you are.”
“You barely know me,” Mikey murmurs.
“I've seen into your soul,” Gerard says.
Mikey shivers again and looks down at his barely touched food. “It isn't fair that I can't return the favor.”
“I'll answer any question you have,” Gerard says.
But Frank chooses that moment to walk into the room, looking self-satisfied. Smugness radiates from him, and Gerard touches his mind. He sees images of Ray blushing and asking him on a date. A date! Frank has never been on a date, not that Gerard can remember. But Frank is full of satisfaction at the encounter, and Gerard smiles.
Mikey is watching them. “You make my head feel funny,” he says. “When you do that with your minds.”
Frank pauses and then takes his seat at Gerard's other side, across from Mikey. “You can feel that?”
“It's like a buzzing,” Mikey says.
Frank and Gerard exchange a look.
He'll be strong in the mind arts when he is turned, Gerard sends.
Frank nods and picks at his food.
“Did it go well with Ray?” Mikey asks, false innocence ringing in his voice.
Frank grins. “We have a date.”
“And what will you do on this date?” Gerard asks.
“Play video games?” Frank says with a shrug. “I don't know. Maybe a movie.”
“You play video games?” Mikey asks.
“Oh, yeah. I rock. I kick ass,” Frank says.
Mikey frowns a little, taking that in. “Vampires are just so... normal,” he murmurs.
“Not completely,” Gerard says.
“Well, yeah, there's the blood thing, and the mind thing, but other than that...”
“Obviously he's never heard you growl,” Frank jokes, but Mikey's eyes get big.
“You growl? Like a dog?” he asks.
“Like a vampire,” Gerard says, emphasizing the last word. “There's nothing dog-like about it.”
Frank giggles and pours himself a glass of wine.
“Can I hear it?” Mikey asks, his voice curious.
“I'm sure you will sooner or later. It's not something I can do on command,” Gerard says.
Mikey nods slowly, then eats more of his dinner. “This is very good.”
“Ray's a good cook,” Frank says proudly.
“Better than you, Mr. Firestarter,” Gerard murmurs.
Mikey watches them, shaking his head a little. Gerard touches his mind on instinct, and sees that he's confused and a little appalled at how normal they are.
“I told you not to do that,” Mikey says, waving his hand as if batting away a fly. Gerard withdraws from his mind.
“I'm sorry, it's a habit,” he says.
“I don't like you doing it without permission,” Mikey says.
Gerard nods and drinks his wine.
“Does alcohol effect you?” Mikey asks.
“If I drink enough of it,” Gerard says. “I'm more likely to get drunk from feeding from someone who's inebriated, however. If it's in the blood, it's easier for me to digest.”
Gerard went through a period of time drinking from people in speakeasies, getting drunk on blood and bootlegged whiskey. Those memories are a blur, and he hasn't gone back to feeding to get drunk in a long time. He missed Michael then, despaired that he would never find him. Frank didn't know what to do. But Brian came along again and picked him up, scolded him, dusted him off, and reminded him that life went on and loved ones would always find each other again.
Gerard hasn't seen Brian in decades now, but he still holds a special place in his heart. He just doesn't ache for him the way he aches for his Michael.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Mikey says.
Gerard shakes his head and says, “Just remembering an old friend.”
Mikey looks like he will ask more, but Frank butts in and says, “So what grade are you in?”
“I'm a junior,” Mikey says. “I'm thinking of dropping out, though.”
“Why?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I hate school. I'd rather hang out and … I don't know. Do anything but homework, anyway.”
“What would you do without an education?” Gerard asks. “You couldn't get a job.”
“You sound like my mom. She wants me to go to college,” Mikey says.
“College is good,” Frank says. Both he and Gerard have taken night classes in the past, eager to learn more about the modern world.
“Why would I go to extra school if I don't have to?” Mikey asks.
“What do you want to do instead?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I'd like to be in a band.”
“Play anything?” Frank asks.
“Sorta. Bass, a little,” Mikey says.
“I'm in a band. If you get better, I could set you up,” Frank says. “It doesn't pay the bills, though. You'd still have to go to school.”
“I saw you play that night,” Mikey says slowly. “I'd forgotten.”
“You've had a lot on your mind since then,” Gerard says. “It's understandable.”
“So... what do you do?” Mikey asks Gerard.
“What do you mean?” Gerard asks.
“I mean, Frank's in a band, so what do you do? Are you in a band, too?”
Gerard laughs. “I'm an artist, I guess. I've sold a few of my pieces. I'm working on a graphic novel.”
“You guess?” Frank says teasingly. “You've been painting for centuries and you guess you're an artist?”
Gerard shrugs and laughs again. Mikey joins in, and the sound of his laughter makes Gerard stop and stare at him.
Mikey goes silent, looking at him. “What?”
“I've never heard you laugh before,” Gerard says.
“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” Mikey asks.
Gerard smiles. “Your laughter is a very good thing.” It's musical to him, so familiar and yet not.
Mikey smiles shyly and returns to his food.
After they eat, Frank proposes a walk outside. “Don't worry,” he says to Mikey, “We'll protect you.”
“Stop reading my mind,” Mikey says.
“Didn't have to, that time,” Frank says happily. “It was written all over your face.”
They walk down by the canal, where the cherry-blossom trees are in full bloom. The fragrance is thick in the air, nearly overwhelming to Frank and Gerard's senses. Gerard concentrates on Mikey's scent: light sweat, soap, shampoo, and musk.
Mikey looks at him strangely when Gerard leans in close. “Are you sniffing me?”
Gerard pulls back, smiling. “I like the way you smell.”
“I want to smell him,” Frank says, leaning far into Mikey's personal space.
Mikey laughs and pushes him back. “Stop that. Crazy vampires.”
“I'm not crazy,” Frank says seriously.
Gerard sends him a wave of reassurance. “No, you aren't.”
Mikey looks back and forth between them as if trying to figure out what they aren't saying, then seems to give up and shrugs. “Okay. Not crazy. Eccentric.”
Frank grins and takes Mikey's hand. Mikey lets him, then looks at Gerard. Hesitantly, Gerard reaches out and takes his other hand. They walk like this for awhile, Mikey between them. It's a warm, humid night. Bats fly above them. Mikey looks up.
“Can you do that?” he asks. “Turn into a bat? Fly?”
“We can't turn into bats,” Gerard says. “But we could outrun them.”
“Show me,” Mikey says.
Frank giggles and runs away, barely a blur in the night.
Gerard looks at Mikey. “Do you trust me?”
Mikey bites his lip and nods. “I guess.”
Gerard picks him up and pulls him against his chest. “Hold on.”
Then he runs. He runs full-out, carrying Mikey with him. Mikey gasps as the wind hits him, and he turns his face away and into Gerard's chest. Gerard passes Frank easily – he's always been faster – and runs straight out of the Belleville. He feels Frank behind him, struggling to catch up, but he doesn't slow. He keeps running, on and on, until he reaches the river. He takes it with one leap, and Mikey cries out in alarm.
He stops then, still holding Mikey. “Trust me,” he says.
Mikey is shaken, but he nods. “I do. I just thought...”
“I wouldn't let you drown,” Gerard says gently. “I will never let anything bad happen to you.”
“Where are we?” Mikey asks, looking around.
“The city,” Gerard says. “Want to go dance?”
“...New York,” Mikey says flatly. “You carried me all the way to New York?”
Frank finally comes, panting and flailing. “You left me behind!”
Gerard grins and kisses him hard. “You should learn to keep up with me.”
When Gerard turns back to Mikey, he's watching them both with interest.
“We're going to dance,” Mikey finally says. “Are you coming with us?”
“Where are we going?” Frank asks. “You can't take him into Albion with us. He's not claimed.”
Mikey raises an eyebrow. “Claimed?”
“Something you aren't ready for yet,” Frank says, ignoring the look Gerard gives him.
“We'll go somewhere else, then,” Gerard says, waving his hand.
“What's Albion?” Mikey asks.
“Vampire club,” Frank says. “You go in there a human, you come out a slave. It's not safe unless you've been claimed by a vampire, and even then it's iffy.”
Mikey shivers. “Let's stay away from there, then.”
Gerard rolls his eyes. “It never crossed my mind,” he says. “We'll go to Gotham.”
“Vampire friendly, human safe,” Frank explains to Mikey. “There are rules in place.”
“I like the name,” Mikey says. “Does anyone dress up as the big black Bat?”
Frank laughs. “They dress up, alright.”
*
The mood inside Gotham is dark and friendly. Mikey is carded at the door, but Frank quickly thralls the bouncer to let them enter together. Several people shift position as the vampires enter with their human companion, and Gerard recognizes a couple of them. He dismisses them, then scans the others for threats.
They greet him without hostility. This is a safe place, a place where vampires and humans intermingle, where no one is better than another. Gerard relaxes.
Mikey is watching him. “Safe?” he asks. His intuition is a beautiful thing. He reads Gerard's body language like Gerard reads minds.
“Yes,” Gerard says, pulling him out onto the floor.
Bodies writhe around them, dressed in black – some in leather, some in chains, all black, everywhere. Frank is the only one in the place wearing red. Mikey's shirt blends in well, and Gerard always wears black.
Mikey dances close, peering into Gerard's face.
“What is it?” Gerard asks.
“Do you want to do that to me?” Mikey asks. “The claim, I mean.”
Something must show on Gerard's face because Mikey nods as if he's answered.
“I've only ever claimed one human before,” Gerard says.
“Who?” Mikey asks.
“Frank,” Gerard answers. Frank moves to their side, dancing against a girl with many piercings. He's smiling at her, telling her about his latest tattoo.
Mikey looks over at him, smiling faintly. “And then you turned him.”
“Not exactly,” Gerard says. “But this is a story for another time.”
“I want to know,” Mikey murmurs. “I want to know everything about you.”
“Just dance with me for now,” Gerard says, pulling him tight against him. Their bodies press close, Mikey hot and damp against Gerard's cool dryness.
“Tell me about claiming?” Mikey asks against Gerard's ear. “What do you want to do to me?”
Gerard growls softly. “I want to make you mine.”
Mikey shivers again and presses his hardening cock against Gerard's hip. “Look into my mind,” he says. “Can you feel what you do to me?”
He can, even without touching Mikey's mind. Mikey smells of arousal now, thick and permeating. Gerard sends him a wave of desire. “Do you feel how much I want you?”
Mikey goes weak in his arms and Gerard has to hold him up.
“Sorry, I didn't realize it was that strong,” Gerard murmurs in his ear.
“Holy shit,” Mikey says.
And then Gerard realizes his mistake. He sent all his emotions to Mikey, not just his lust. His love, his devotion, his everything. Even the possessiveness that drives Gerard to hold Mikey closer and growl at an approaching vampire.
Mikey doesn't even notice. He's too busy collecting himself again after the onslaught of Gerard's emotions.
“I'm sorry,” Gerard says. “I miscalculated my hold over my feelings when I'm with you.”
“Oh,” Mikey says. “You feel a lot.”
Gerard catches his gaze and nods. Mikey's eyes are large now as he stares back.
“You feel all that... for me?” he asks softly.
Gerard can't do more than nod.
Instead of running away as Gerard expects him to, Mikey rests his head on Gerard's shoulder. He continues to dance, albeit slowly now. “I don't know what to say to that.”
“Shh. You don't have to answer my feelings,” Gerard says. “I know this is still new to you.”
Gerard is still touching Mikey's mind, so he begins to pull away.
Don't, Mikey sends hesitantly. I've gotten used to it.
Gerard bathes Mikey's mind with reassurance, flooding through the cracks of denial and hesitancy. Mikey sighs comfortably and holds Gerard closer.
Frank dances closer to them, and Gerard reaches out for him. Frank looks at Mikey, then places a hand on Mikey's back as he grinds against Gerard's side.
“Okay?” Gerard asks Mikey.
“Yeah,” Mikey says. He leans against Frank's hand and Frank moves behind him, pressing against his back.
They move as one, slowly and to their own music. Gerard feels only contentment and safety from Mikey, no discomfort at all. Gerard smiles at Frank over Mikey's shoulder and gently kisses Mikey's temple.
They get Mikey home safely before the dawn. He seems tired, utterly worn out emotionally, yet when Gerard touches his mind one last time he finds only happiness.
“And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest,” Gerard murmurs in his ear before Mikey leaves.
Mikey smiles tiredly and says, “Are you going to kiss me?”
“If I start now I won't want to stop,” Gerard says.
“Is that a no?” Mikey asks, leaning closer.
Gerard shakes his head mutely and presses his lips against Mikey's. It's gentle and soft, something he's not often able to do. But he loves this human, loves him with all of his soul. So he brushes his lips across Mikey's like a feather, then pulls away.
Mikey has his eyes closed and he's clinging to Gerard's shoulders as if he might fall.
“Go home before you get in trouble with your mother,” Gerard says gently.
Mikey nods and climbs into his car. “Can I come again tomorrow night?”
“You're always welcome here,” Gerard says.
Gerard watches as Mikey drives away. Frank is by his side again, watching with him.
“You were gentle with him,” Frank says. “More than you ever were with me.”
“Jealous?” Gerard asks.
“No. I know what he means to you,” Frank says.
“He's so young,” Gerard says. “He doesn't know what he's getting into.”
“He's following his heart,” Frank says quietly.
“I don't want to break it,” Gerard says.
“You have to be careful with him,” Frank says. “Keep moving slowly, even if he wants more.”
“I want to turn him,” Gerard says. “I want the assurance that he'll be with me forever.”
Frank wraps an arm around his waist. “Even if you turn him, that will be his decision alone.”
Gerard doesn't look at him. “Then I'll have to make sure he chooses me, won't I?”
*
“So tell me about Frank,” Mikey says, holding a game controller up high as his man jumps on the screen. It is two months to the day after their first meeting. They are just hanging out, playing video games in Gerard and Frank's house. It's getting late, but neither of them wants to say goodbye.
Gerard pauses the game. “What do you want to know?”
“If you didn't turn him into a vampire, who did?” Mikey asks. “And why do you call him your childe if you weren't the one who did it?”
“I adopted him,” Gerard says slowly, putting down his controller. “He wasn't turned in the usual way, with love or affection. His maker was insane. She tortured him, then turned him so he wouldn't break under more torture.”
Mikey's eyes widen as Gerard talks, and he grabs Gerard's hand. “I thought you claimed him before that.”
“I did, but then Frank found out something about me that made him run away. I tried to keep an eye on him, but...”
“You couldn't protect him? Even though he was yours?” Mikey asks.
Gerard shakes his head. “He was in terrible shape when Brian found him and brought him back to me-”
“Who's Brian?” Mikey asks.
Gerard pauses for a moment. “He's a very good friend,” he says. “He's...” He doesn't know how to describe Brian. He was Gerard's sire in another life, and Gerard feels closer to him than he does to Azrael.
“You love him,” Mikey murmurs.
“Yes,” Gerard says. “Very much.”
“Where is he now?” Mikey asks.
“Sleeping, most likely,” Gerard says. “The last I heard from him, he was in California. But that's been some time ago.”
“You don't seem too broken up about being apart from him,” Mikey says.
“His childe, Julia, she's the one who tortured Frank. He could have killed her but he didn't. He let her live,” Gerard explains. The pain has lessened over the years, but he still hates that Brian allowed Julia to keep her life after what she did to Gerard's Court.
“Long story, huh?” Mikey says. “So how did you adopt Frank? Are there papers you sign or something?”
“There's a ritual,” Gerard says.
Mikey fiddles with the seam of the sofa cushion. “What about claiming? Is there a ritual involved there, too?”
“Sort of. It's not quite as involved,” Gerard says. “I take your blood, and you take some of mine.”
“That's all?” Mikey asks.
“No,” Gerard says with a smile. “There's lots of sex involved too.”
“Sounds cool,” Mikey says, smiling back. “What does it do?”
“Prevents you from growing old. It shows other vampires that you're taken and not to be messed with. Gives you strength and some protection against … disease and the like.”
The disease that took Michael in the first place flashes through Gerard's mind and he grimaces.
“What?”
“Do you believe in Fate?” Gerard asks. He feels as if his future hangs in the balance at this moment. He remembers Azrael's rantings against God and Fate and anything of the like. He knows in his heart that Mikey is nothing like him, is closer to human than anyone Gerard has ever met.
Mikey chews his lip. “I do. I think. I mean, I think I always did, but after I met you I really believed, you know?”
Gerard smiles. “I do know.”
Mikey slides his hand into Gerard's and entwines their fingers. “Why haven't you taken me to bed yet? Why haven't you claimed me?”
“It hasn't been that long,” Gerard says.
“It's been two months,” Mikey says. “And you know I want to.”
“When you drink my blood, everything will change,” Gerard says. What he doesn't say is that Mikey will likely remember their past lives together after that. Gerard is both eager and nervous about this.
“Change how?” Mikey asks.
“We'll be connected,” Gerard says. “More in tune with each other. Able to speak telepathically, if you choose. Able to read each other's thoughts and emotions.”
“Well, you do that to me already,” Mikey says. “I think I'd like being able to turn the tables on you.”
Gerard smiles and cups his face, bringing him forward for a gentle kiss.
A knock at the door disturbs them. Gerard sends his mind out and freezes.
“Leave,” he says to Mikey. “Out the back door. Don't look back, just go.”
“What?” Mikey says, and Gerard pulls him to his feet and starts pushing him towards the back of the house.
But Azrael is there on the back steps when Gerard opens the door.
“Going somewhere, childe of mine?” he asks. He looks menacing standing there in the dark, dressed all in black with long, black hair and red eyes. Beside Gerard, Mikey shudders and takes a step back. Azrael smiles. “And who is this? A human?”
Gerard swallows hard and holds the door open. “Mikey was just leaving.”
“Mikey. Mikey, what an immature name. Do you mind if I call you Michael?”
Gerard holds his breath and stares at Azrael.
Mikey nods. “My grandmother calls me Michael.”
“Not Gerard?” Azrael asks. “That's strange. Then again, the name might bring back bad memories for him, poor childe.”
Azrael is acting even more unnerving than usual. More sinister. Gerard remembers well how he would treat a human before feasting on their blood. That is the way he's treating them both right now.
“Sire,” Gerard says, trying to placate him. “You and I have many centuries to catch up on. Let the human leave.”
Azrael grabs Mikey's arm and pulls him close, looking him up and down. “I fed mere hours ago, and yet I find myself hungering yet again.”
Gerard growls. “Let him go.”
Azrael laughs but keeps holding Mikey's arm. He's pressing hard into the muscle and Mikey winces. “You haven't claimed him yet,” Azrael says, looking at Mikey's neck.
“I was going to do that tonight,” Gerard says.
“So is this human the reason why you neglected to come when I called for you?” Azrael asks. “If I were a smaller creature, I'd be jealous.”
Mikey looks back and forth between them, his fear heightening. Gerard touches his mind with reassurance, but his own anxiety taints the emotion.
“Do you believe in an afterlife, Michael?” Azrael asks, his fangs extended and leaning towards Mikey's neck.
“I guess,” Mikey says.
“You believe in God?” Azrael asks, breathing on Mikey's neck.
Gerard roughly pulls Mikey away from him and positions himself to Mikey's front. “Leave him alone.”
“He's just another human,” Azrael hisses. “He cannot love you, not truly. He cannot accept you for what you are.”
Gerard holds his head high and is about to answer when Mikey says, “I do accept him.”
“You have no idea who he is!” Azrael rages, lunging at Mikey. Gerard stands between them, pushing Azrael back with both hands.
“Sire!” he shouts. “Enough of this!”
“Yes, I've had quite enough of his kind. Trying to live above their stations, murdering without cause. How can you associate with this one, Gerard?” Azrael says. “Ah, I see. It is because of your brother, isn't it? This one looks like him. He feels familiar to you. You think he holds your brother's soul, don't you?”
Mikey goes still, listening.
“But humans don't have souls, Gerard,” Azrael says. “They are worse than us. They kill each other, and kill our kind as well. I've had enough of humans. I will not stand to let this one influence you.”
“Let him go,” Gerard says again, softly, knowing now he spoke to a madman. “And he will not trouble you again.”
Mikey begins to slip around Gerard, heading towards the door slowly.
“No. I think I will kill him,” Azrael says. He looks at Mikey and licks his fangs. “I like young blood.”
Mikey trembles and Gerard sends frantically in his mind for Frank. He should have done so sooner, he knows. Now it may be too late.
“You cannot kill him,” Gerard says. “He's under my protection.”
“Like I said before, you haven't claimed him,” Azrael says.
“If you're hungry, I'll send for a donor,” Gerard says desperately. “Or we'll hunt. It's been so long since we've hunted together, hasn't it?”
“Why does he mean so much to you?” Azrael snarls.
“Please, Sire. Please,” Gerard begs. “Leave him alone.”
Azrael stares with loathing in his red eyes as Mikey slips out the door. He doesn't stop him, though, even though Gerard knows he could.
“He looks just like your brother,” Azrael whispers, still looking after Mikey.
Gerard swallows hard. Azrael could still choose to go after Mikey, it would only take the slightest misstep.
“Do you want to go to the city?” Gerard asks. “The hunting grounds are fertile there.”
Azrael finally looks at him. “What has happened to you, that you care so much for a human?”
“I've changed,” Gerard says.
Azrael snarls and presses him against the wall. “You are what I made you to be.”
Gerard stares into Azrael's eyes, touching his mind. “I'm not the same creature you made.”
Azrael recoils from the emotion he receives from Gerard's mind. “No, I see you are not.”
“Gerard!” Frank calls, then runs into the room. “What-”
“And who is this?” Azrael asks, looking Frank up and down.
“This is my childe, Frank,” Gerard says.
“Ah. So you did make a childe,” Azrael says. “A grandchilde for me. How ... familial.”
“Frank, this is Azrael,” Gerard says. “My sire.” He's still pinned against the wall and he's sure it makes for a confusing sight.
Frank touches Gerard's mind. Where's Mikey?
He went home, Gerard sends back.
Azrael lets go of Gerard and stalks over to Frank. He leans down and sniffs Frank's neck, breathing in his scent. Frank is very still, looking at Gerard.
“You've done good, Gerard,” Azrael murmurs.
Gerard knows Azrael must be out of his mind with grief over his sire's death, and so he goes along with whatever Azrael wants.
Azrael wants them to hunt as a family, so Frank and Gerard agree. They run into the city, Azrael much faster than either of them. They go to a dance club and Azrael points out a young man he wants to watch Frank feed from.
Frank thralls the human and leads him over to a dark corner. He feeds, slowly and deliberately, and Azrael huffs. “Kill him, boy,” he says.
Frank blinks at Azrael and turns to Gerard.
“No,” Gerard says. “We don't kill innocents anymore.”
Azrael tilts his head. “Innocent? Your idealism is misguided. I thought I taught you better than this.”
Frank licks the human's wounds closed and sends him on his way. Azrael focuses and thralls another human to approach him.
Gerard watches as Azrael bares his fangs, holding the woman immobile with his mind. Fright appears on the woman's face, but she is unable to move.
“Do you see, Gerard? This is how you treat them. Like cattle to be slaughtered. Because that is all they are, do you understand?” Azrael grabs the woman by one arm and drags her close. He rips into her throat is if into a piece of meat.
He laps at her wound, wasting more than he drinks. She dies with a horrified gurgle. He releases her, letting her body fall to the ground.
“You used to enjoy such things,” he says to Gerard. “Surely you haven't forgotten.”
Gerard feels sick and hungry at the same time.
“Humans are filthy creatures, childe,” Azrael says. “Only good for what they can give us. Blood. Sex. Companionship occasionally, but you can't count on them for that. They live so fast and die so easily.” He calls another human forward, this one a teenaged girl.
Gerard and Frank are working frantically to keep the crowd from noticing.
“Disposable,” Azrael says, taking the girl by the neck. “That is what they are. Animals, all of them.”
“Let her go,” Gerard says lowly.
Azrael looks up as if surprised. “Why? Do you want her, instead?”
He's mad. Deeply and truly mad, Frank sends.
Gerard nods at him and turns back to Azrael. “I haven't fed yet,” he says.
Azrael nearly throws the girl into Gerard's arms. Immediately, Gerard sends her feelings of safety and warmth. She smiles up at him, heavily thralled.
He bites into her neck and drinks slowly, savoring. He pays attention to her heartbeat so he doesn't take too much. Then he steadies her and lets her go.
“What was that?” Azrael says.
“That was me feeding,” Gerard says, staying calm. “Now we can go home.”
“You call this a hunt? One human each?” Azrael says.
“It is enough for us,” Gerard says.
“To survive? Yes. To live?” Azrael asks, and pauses.
“I live just fine,” Gerard says.
“What is at your home that you can offer me?” Azrael asks.
Gerard licks his lips and walks forward, with purpose. He presses against Azrael and murmurs, “I offer myself.”
In his mind, he can feel Frank's horror. But Azrael is Gerard's sire, and he doesn't know what else to do. He will let him fuck him and sleep, and tomorrow night Gerard will figure out what to do. He just has to buy some time.
Except Azrael laughs and pushes him away. “I don't think so, childe. I don't want you like this, with human compassion and … ethics. Why would I?”
It doesn't exactly wound Gerard, but he would be lying if he said it didn't hurt. Being rejected by one's sire is painful.
Gerard says, “You think I was so perfect before? I couldn't love. I couldn't give. I hurt those I should have protected.”
“Do you love me, childe?” Azrael asks curiously. He presses on Gerard's mind, forcing him to tell the truth.
“I feel affection for you,” Gerard admits. The pressure on his mind bears down until he says, “But I don't love you.”
“I thought not,” Azrael murmurs. “What of your childe? Do you love him?”
“Yes, I do,” Gerard says. “Very much.”
“And your human? The one you call Mikey?” Azrael says. “No, don't answer. I can see it in your mind. I could snap his neck like a dry twig, you know.”
Gerard, still under Azrael's influence, answers without qualm. “I would kill you before you could do that.”
Azrael, instead of getting angry, laughs at this statement. “You think you can kill your own sire?”
“If I have to,” Gerard says. “I'd rather not.”
Beside him, Frank is getting antsy. Shut up, Gee.
“What if I killed you first?” Azrael asks, pressing his hand over Gerard's heart. It's a hard press, as if he's contemplating going through the skin at that very moment.
What if he killed Gerard? Brian would rise, he knows. Brian would get revenge.
“Ah, I see it,” Azrael says, searching Gerard's memories. “Who is this Brian and why should he care so much?”
Azrael sifts through Gerard's memories as if they are sand. He sees linked memories, of Brigh long ago, of Brian near the present day, of fucking furiously and loving twice as fiercely. He sees Mihaitus, Michael, Mikey...
“No,” Azrael whispers.
Gerard blinks back tears at the suddenness of the memories flying through his head. He feels them all at once in this moment, the happy and the horrible.
“You believe,” Azrael says, hanging his head.
“Did you love Selim?” Gerard asks, wiping his eyes. “Because his soul will be reborn, someday. All you have to do is wait.”
“I loved him, I hated him. I long to be with him again,” Azrael whispers.
“Then you will,” Gerard says.
“I don't believe in Fate,” Azrael says.
“Then make your own,” Gerard says. “That is what you taught me, isn't it?”
Azrael looks up again, staring into Gerard's eyes. I don't believe in myself, either.
“Learn to,” Gerard says. “That's all I can say.”
Azrael reaches out and cups Gerard's chin. “How?”
Gerard takes his hand away gently. “First, you must get over your grief. Stop taking out Selim's murder on innocent people.”
How did Brian deal with Julia's grief?
“How long has it been since you slept?” Gerard asks. He knows Azrael will pick up on the meaning.
“I've never slept,” Azrael says, “Never for more than a week or so.”
“Maybe it's time,” Gerard says. “Sleep, and then when you wake, you can look for Selim.”
“How will I find him?” Azrael asks.
Gerard smiles a little. “Fate.”
*
When Gerard awakes the next night, he feels Mikey's presence in the house. He pads downstairs and follows the sound of a heartbeat into his studio.
Mikey has all the sheets off their canvases, and completed paintings pulled out all around. He looks up when Gerard comes through the door.
“What is this?” Mikey asks, pointing at one painting of Mihaitus. He's barely dressed, just a piece of linen draped over his shoulder.
“Someone I knew in another life,” Gerard answers truthfully.
Mikey's eyes narrow. “Your brother?”
Gerard nods.
“Tell me what I don't know, Gerard,” Mikey says. “Please.”
Gerard closes his eyes. “Once upon a time-”
“This isn't a fairy tale,” Mikey says.
“No, it isn't,” Gerard says. “Fairy tales always have a moral, and I can't find one for this story.”
“Do you believe in reincarnation? Is that what this is about?” Mikey asks.
Gerard closes his eyes. “I've known you before, yes.”
“Were you going to tell me about it?” Mikey asks. “Or just leave me in the dark?”
“I would have told you after I claimed you,” Gerard says. “You would remember then. When you take my blood, you'll know for yourself.”
“You don't love me for myself,” Mikey says blank-faced.
“I-”
“You love me because I look like your brother,” Mikey says.
“No,” Gerard says slowly, dragging the word out. “I love you for your soul.”
“That's pretty,” Mikey says, then laughs. The sound is hollow.
“Can I tell you about him? About them?” Gerard asks, waving his hand at the paintings. “Will you listen with an open mind?”
Mikey looks lost. Confused. He nods hesitantly.
Gerard sighs and goes over to his favorite portrait, one of Michael at fifteen, smiling widely. The painting is of a time shortly before his death. “My brother was only sixteen when the plague took him. Do you know about the Great Plague of London?”
Mikey shakes his head mutely.
“It was a later outbreak of the Black Death,” Gerard murmurs, looking into the eyes of the portrait. “It started in 1665. I was twenty, unmarried, the heir to my family's fortune. It struck the docks first, and then the poor outside the city. But it wasn't long before it spread to London itself.”
Mikey nods slowly, listening.
“By September, our neighbors' houses were quiet, and our own house was ill,” Gerard says. “The servants fled, probably to die elsewhere. I watched our parents succumb to the plague, laid them out in the parlor myself. I wasn't sick, not yet. Then Michael fell ill.”
Gerard swallows and looks away from the painting.
“He was only a year younger than me,” Mikey says softly.
“He was... he'd never...”
“He was a virgin,” Mikey says.
“Yes. There was so much of life he never experienced. I remember thinking that as I watched him become more and more sick,” Gerard says. His voice is thick.
Mikey takes his hand and looks at the painting. “His eyes are dark.”
Gerard nods. “Your cheekbones are higher and your hair is darker,” he says.
“Tell me the rest,” Mikey urges, squeezing his hand.
“I prayed. I believed in God so much, and I believed he would spare Michael,” Gerard says. “I prayed until my voice was hoarse.”
“But he died,” Mikey whispers.
Gerard closes his eyes tightly. “He asked me to climb into bed with him. I did. I held him, and then I fell asleep. I was so tired. And when I woke, he was cool again. I thought the fever had broken.”
“But that wasn't it,” Mikey says. He wraps an arm around Gerard's shoulders and hugs him.
“He died during the night, in my arms. I... I couldn't bear to leave him, so I stayed just like that. And that's when Azrael found me.” He leans his head on Mikey's shoulder.
“I'm not him,” Mikey says softly. “Even if I believed in reincarnation, even if I had memories of him – I'm still not him. I'm me. I'm Mikey, not Michael or whoever the one in the toga is.”
“Mihaitus,” Gerard murmurs. “We were twins.”
“Yeah, but it wasn't you, was it?” Mikey asks. “And I'm an only child. Plus, I don't think I'd want to fuck my own brother, you know? No offense.”
“None taken,” Gerard says dryly.
“So I'm not him. I need you to understand that,” Mikey says.
“I do,” Gerard says. “I have memories of past lives, and I know I'm a separate person from them. I'll remember that you are, too.”
Mikey bites his bottom lip. “I don't know if I want to remember dying,” he says.
Gerard makes a face. “It isn't pleasant. But I'll be right here for you.”
“Did you know Frank in a previous life?” Mikey says, then frowns. “I can't believe I'm talking about this like it's true.”
“No, I didn't know Frank.” Gerard smiles a little. “It is true. I didn't accept it well at first, myself. You're taking this much easier than I did.”
Mikey shrugs. “How did you find out?”
“Brian,” Gerard says. “We were together in two previous lives.”
“Ah,” Mikey says, as if something suddenly fell into place. “You must really miss him.”
“I do. But not as much as I would miss you,” Gerard says.
Mikey moves closer and says, “Would you love me if I wasn't your brother?”
“You aren't my brother,” Gerard says slowly. “But … yes, if I knew you. I would love you no matter who you were.”
“Sweet talker,” Mikey mutters, then presses his lips against Gerard's.
Gerard kisses back, wrapping his arms around Mikey, pulling him closer.
“What do you want?” Mikey asks. “Truthfully. What do you want from me?”
“I want to turn you,” Gerard whispers against his lips.
Mikey stiffens, then relaxes in increments. “Why?”
“Because I don't want to lose you,” Gerard says. “Because I want to share my blood with you. Because I want you to be my childe.”
“I'm not ready for that,” Mikey says. “Is that okay?”
“I'm in no hurry,” Gerard says. “Though I should claim you to protect you.”
“Your sire doesn't like me,” Mikey murmurs.
“He doesn't really like humans all that much right now,” Gerard explains. “He lost his sire to a human mob a few months ago.”
“Would it be painful to lose a sire?” Mikey asks.
Gerard nods. “The connection between sire and childe is strong.”
“I want that with you,” Mikey whispers. “Just not yet.”
“You should finish school,” Gerard says.
Mikey groans and rolls his eyes. “Can we not talk about school right now?”
Gerard smiles and presses against him. “Would you rather I take you to bed?”
“Yes,” Mikey breathes.
Gerard leads him up the stairs slowly, to the bedchamber that he shares with Frank. But Frank will not be home for many hours. He's having his date with Ray. Gerard wishes him the best and puts him out of his head.
Mikey slides his hands down Gerard's sides and tugs at his shirt. “Off?”
Gerard nods and holds his hands up, letting Mikey take the lead. His shirt is quickly dropped onto the floor and then his hands are tugging at Mikey's clothes.
Mikey is beautiful. Gerard must say this aloud, because Mikey blushes and shakes his head. “Not like you,” he says.
But once Mikey is naked and spread out below him, Gerard has to say it again. “You're gorgeous, Mikey,” he says, leaning down to kiss him.
Mikey is hot from head to toe. Gerard has forgotten what it feels like to be with a human. Mikey's skin is giving off heat like a furnace, and Gerard presses against him, soaking up the warmth.
He's careful, only biting a little with blunt teeth, tracing patterns with his tongue down Mikey's throat. Mikey moans and wraps his arms tightly around him, holding him close. Gerard can feel the throb of his cock against his skin.
“Go into my mind,” Mikey says. “I want you to see what I feel.”
Gerard touches Mikey's mind and feels overwhelming waves of love, adoration, and desire. Gerard opens his mind to Mikey, projecting what he's feeling into his mind. Soon, Mikey will be able to touch his mind on his own, but for now he needs help.
Mikey gasps when he feels the depth of Gerard's feelings. “Fuck,” he says softly.
Gerard smiles and takes Mikey's face in his hands, then presses their foreheads together gently. “Tell me what you want.”
Mikey swallows audibly, then whispers, “Bite me. I want you to bite me.”
Growling lightly, Gerard nuzzles Mikey's neck. Mikey shivers and tilts his head back, exposing his throat. Gerard licks up Mikey's throat to his chin, then moves over to the side of his neck to kiss there lightly.
“C'mon, Gee. Do it,” Mikey says.
Gerard bites. His fangs slice through Mikey's skin, tapping the vein. Gerard sucks hard, blood flowing into his mouth.
Mikey tastes like ambrosia, food of the gods. His blood is thick and full of life. Gerard swallows his first mouthful and moans. He knows not to take too much, but he wants so much more.
You'll have such a pretty scar, Gerard sends.
“Oh, God,” Mikey breathes, rocking up against him. “Harder.”
Gerard clamps down harder, his fangs driving deeper until they can go no further. He drinks slowly, petting Mikey's hair.
When he's had enough – just a little bit more – he pulls back and runs his lips over the twin wounds, smearing blood across Mikey's neck. Then he bites into his wrist and offers it to Mikey. “Just a little,” he says.
Mikey licks his lips, staring at the blood dripping from Gerard's wrist. Then he takes it into his mouth, sucking lightly. He swallows, then swallows again.
“That's enough,” Gerard says softly, and pulls his wrist away.
Then Gerard gets the lube from the bedside and slicks his fingers.
Mikey licks his lips nervously. “I've never gone this far before.”
Gerard pauses and then says, “Roll over. Get up on your hands and knees. It'll be easier that way.”
Mikey obeys, looking at Gerard over his shoulder. “I trust you.”
Gerard leans down and kisses the base of his spine, then rubs over his hole with slick fingers. “Have you ever done this to yourself?”
“Yeah,” Mikey says, rocking back a little. “I can take it.”
“Reach out to me,” Gerard murmurs, guiding Mikey's mind to his own, showing him the way.
Mikey gasps as their minds touch. Their emotions swirl around each other in spirals, until it is impossible to tell who is feeling what. It is only important that the emotions are there. There is so much devotion, so much love between them.
Gerard pushes two fingers inside and Mikey rocks back on the intrusion, taking them faster than Gerard would have thought. Memories roll over them both, and Gerard sees Mikey riding his own fingers, his head thrown back, his mind consumed with Gerard.
“Oh,” Gerard breathes as his fingers slip past the tight ring of muscle and push in deep. Mikey is so hot, burning like a furnace. He clenches around Gerard's fingers, then begs for more.
Gerard slicks up again, then adds a third finger. Mikey whimpers and pants, pushing back so that he opens up. Gerard's cock twitches with want and leaks at the tip.
Mikey shifts on his hands and knees, rocking back on Gerard's hand, fucking himself. The lines of his body are long, his muscles lithe in a way that is simply gorgeous. “Please,” he gasps, angling his body for more.
Gerard pulls his fingers out slowly and slicks his cock. He moves into position and rubs the head over Mikey's hole, not quite teasing. Mikey moans and goes still, whispering, Please, please, please... in Gerard's mind.
With one hand on Mikey's hip, Gerard presses inside. Slow, so slow, until Mikey rocks back and takes him faster. Then he is in and Mikey is feeling full and stretched, just the slightest hint of pain in his mind among the nearly overwhelming pleasure.
Gerard sends Mikey the sensations he feels, so that Mikey whimpers at the feeling of his own tight heat.
“Fuck,” Mikey whispers. “More, please...”
And Gerard gives it to him. He slides out, slowly, then angles himself just right and thrusts back in. Mikey cries out as Gerard's cock slides over his prostate. He is shaking on his knees. His arms give out and he leans on his elbows, his ass high in the air for Gerard to take.
Gerard sends him a picture of them from his perspective, so that Mikey can see the long line of his spine, the smooth skin of his back. He sends sensations again, of slick heat and tight muscle. Mikey whimpers and begs without words for more.
Slowly, Gerard begins to thrust in earnest. He focuses everything on Mikey's pleasure, so that his cock is hitting his prostate with every slide, so that when his fingers dig into Mikey's hips it's just the way Mikey wants them to.
“More,” Mikey says, his voice rough and low. His cock is leaking and bobbing, and Gerard wraps his hand around it and begins to stroke.
Mikey gasps and thrusts into Gerard's hand, then moves back against his cock. He is trapped between two sensations, thrusting and rocking back hard, until he's moving in tandem with Gerard. They rock together as one, Mikey fucking and being fucked, Gerard stroking and thrusting deep and hard.
Mikey climbs higher and higher into pleasure, reaching up until he's flying for one long, glorious moment. They are so tightly linked in their minds that Mikey's orgasm triggers Gerard's and they come together, two voices crying out in ecstasy.
They come down slowly, both of them panting, their bodies twitching with aftershocks. Gerard moves onto the bed, rolling on his back, and Mikey curls up against his side.
Their minds are still connected, and feelings of contentment and love flow back and forth between them.
“I'm yours now,” Mikey murmurs, kissing Gerard's chest.
“You've always been mine,” Gerard says. He pets Mikey's hair and twirls pieces between his fingertips. Mikey's hair is straight and brown, so unlike Michael's blond curls.
Mikey rolls onto his stomach and props his head up on his folded arms. “You'll have to teach me more mind stuff.”
Gerard smiles. “I will. You might even be able to communicate with Frank, since we share blood.”
“I like Frank,” Mikey says. “I just don't know if I want to be that close to him.”
“He likes you, too,” Gerard says.
Mikey is silent for a moment, his mind pulling back a little so that he can think in private.
“What is it?” Gerard asks.
“You're in love with him,” Mikey says.
Gerard nods. “I am.”
“And you're in love with me,” Mikey points out.
“Totally and completely,” Gerard whispers, kissing Mikey's forehead.
Mikey nods slowly. “What would happen if I fell in love with Frank?”
“Do you think that's possible?” Gerard asks.
Mikey shrugs. “I like him. He's cool. And he's really hot.”
Gerard smiles and sends Mikey a mental picture of the first time he met Frank. Mikey takes the image and looks it over, smiling a little.
“He was beautiful then, but in a different way,” Mikey says. “He looks weird without the tattoos and piercings.”
“And the hair,” Gerard says. Frank has never grown his hair out quite as long as it was when they first met.
“It's hard to believe he's so old,” Mikey says. “I mean, he seems so … modern, you know?”
“If a vampire doesn't change with the times, he goes a little insane,” Gerard says, thinking of Azrael.
“How have you changed?” Mikey asks.
Gerard looks at the ceiling and thinks. “When I was human, I was very religious. I wanted to be a priest at one point.”
Mikey laughs softly. “I can't see that.”
“Well, I did. I wanted to help people, and to serve my God,” Gerard says.
“Do you believe in God now?” Mikey asks curiously.
Gerard sighs. “After I was turned, I lost my faith. My sire drilled into my head that existence is temporary and random, that humans are nothing but animals, and when they die merely crumble to dust. He taught me that humans have no souls, that vampires are the closest things to gods, and that we could live without repercussions.”
“But now...”
“Now I know he was wrong. About everything,” Gerard says.
“And God?” Mikey asks.
Gerard smiles. “I believe there is Someone out there. I carry memories of worshiping gods of nature and force, and gods of emotion and intellect. I... I don't know what is out there, but I think the nature of God is something humans and vampires cannot know. We just make up stories that make sense to us because the real thing is beyond our ken.”
“I believe,” Mikey says. He closes his eyes and Gerard can feel him searching for buried memories, for flashes of images from a long time past. Gerard adds the strength of his mind to Mikey's, helping him find what he is looking for.
Mikey gasps as the first memory is uncovered.
“Slowly,” Gerard murmurs. “Don't take on too much at once.”
Mikey nods and then carefully turns over a bright, dreamlike image. The sun shines on brightly colored flowers and a light breeze musses his curls. He holds a silver spoon in his hands and he is digging into the nearly-black dirt. The dirt is cool against his hands and damp, and he uncovers a pale, wriggling earthworm. He picks it up with chubby fingers.
Mother is going to be so angry, dream-Gerard says. You've taken her best silver and you're filthy now.
Wormy? Michael says, holding up his treasure.
Gerard's frown transforms into a smile as he watches his baby brother. It's a lovely worm, Michael.
Michael smiles back and clasps the worm tightly in his hand. Then he reaches out, offering it to Gerard. For you.
Gerard takes the earthworm carefully. Love and affection shine in his eyes. Thank you very much, good sir.
Good sir, good sir! Michael sing-songs.
The memory ends, leaving them both with a feeling as warm as the summer sun.
“He adored you,” Mikey says.
“And I felt the same in return,” Gerard says, and carefully finds the right memory to share.
He is nearly still a baby himself. Mother is propped up in the bed, looking worn but happy. Gerard climbs onto the bed carefully, because Father said Mother is still weak and isn't to overexert herself.
Mother is holding a blanket. No, there's something in the blanket. Is it a present? Why is it in a blanket? Why does mother look so tired?
Come here and see your baby brother, Mother says.
Gerard has heard this word brother before, but he doesn't know what it means. He knows what a baby is, though. He used to be a baby. There's been a baby in Mother's tummy for ages.
Mother moves the blanket so Gerard can see inside. A small face is revealed. It is red and scrunched, its nose flat. Two eyes gaze up at nothing, dark blue and unfocused.
Gerard frowns as he looks down at the baby. Surely he was never so small.
May I hold it? Gerard asks.
Him, not it, Mother says. And his name is Michael.
Impatiently, Gerard asks again. May I hold him?
Mother nods. Sit back on the pillow and fold your legs. Look at how I hold him, do you see how I support his head? You have to be very careful with his head because his neck is not strong.
It's a lot of words at once for Gerard, but he struggles to understand. Babies are weak and breakable. He has to be careful.
Gerard holds his arms like Mother shows him, then watches as the baby is settled into them. The baby is so light and small. Gerard isn't sure he likes it. Him. But he feels good in Gerard's arms, warm and alive.
Then the baby does a curious thing. He looks up, and for a moment his eyes focus, meeting Gerard's. The baby stares, and Gerard feels something strange turn over in his heart.
Brother, Gerard says to the baby. To Michael. You're my brother.
And you are his, Mother says gently.
Gerard watches the baby seriously. Understanding enters his mind. They are brothers, and brothers mean they belong to each other.
You'll have to protect him sometimes, Mother says. And love him with all of your heart. Don't become jealous or angry with him, because he's just a baby and doesn't know any better.
Gerard only understands some of that. Protect, that is what he does to his wooden toys to keep them from being taken by others. He can protect. Love is what he feels for Mother, though he gets angry with her sometimes when she won't let him play, or when she sends him away from her. He doesn't know what jealous means.
Mine, Gerard whispers to baby Michael. You're all mine.
The baby keeps looking up into Gerard's face, eyes large and dark. And for the first time in his life, Gerard doesn't feel alone.
He lets the memory fade, and when he opens his eyes, Mikey is looking at him with a wide, vulnerable look. Gerard can see himself through Mikey's eyes, like a distorted mirror. Distorted because Mikey does not see Gerard in the way he sees himself.
Mikey sees Gerard as a shining, beautiful creature. His eyes are larger, his hair softer, his lips fuller. Darkness covers Gerard's aura like a shroud of lace, enticing and safe. Gerard rebels against this image with a frown, sending his own picture of himself. He is scarred from his past, and his darkness is dangerous. His heart is just now healing, only able to love again through others' intervention. Without them, he is cold and black inside, lacking kindness and understanding.
Mikey shakes his head. “Maybe you were like that once,” he says. “But now you're something different. You've... evolved.”
Painfully, Gerard lets his darkest memories surface. Mikey looks at them. Gerard expects him to feel shock, confusion, or betrayal. But Mikey examines them in a detached way – no, not detached. He is accepting. He skims over the memories, then turns them over to look at the bottom, to feel the emotions. He doesn't find many. Gerard was lonely and confused, eager to please his sire, but he felt little besides that.
Mikey sighs tiredly. “You've changed.”
Gerard can feel his weariness and pulls back from Mikey's mind. He holds him close and kisses his hair. “Sleep. All this mind magic has made you tired.”
“Is it magic, really?” Mikey asks. He blinks sleepily into Gerard's face, curious.
“That's what Brian calls it. Azrael always called it an art.”
“I think I'll call it magic, too,” Mikey says, closing his eyes.
“Sleep,” Gerard says again. The sunrise is still hours away, and he can hold Mikey like this until it's time for him to go.
Mikey drifts off, his breath becoming even. An hour later, Frank slips into the bed and looks at Mikey's claim mark.
He's beautiful, Frank sends, careful not to wake Mikey with a whisper.
How was your date? Gerard asks.
Frank grins and lays back on the bed, his arms beneath his head. I could fall in love with Ray.
A feeling pricks at Gerard's heart. Not jealousy. He's happy for Frank. But something that feels like loss twinges in his chest.
Frank looks at him in understanding. I will always be your childe.
Gerard reaches out for his hand and twines their fingers together. Will you leave me?
Love and devotion floods Gerard's mind as Frank sends him all his emotions. Has Brian left you?
Gerard shakes his head. Even though he hasn't seen Brian in decades, he can still feel him with him. His soul lingers, their love preserving the connection.
But still, Gerard does not want Frank to go. I don't want to live without you.
He can feel Frank turn this over in his mind. Finally, he sends, Then all of us will live together.
Gerard can't help but laugh. You and me, Mikey and Ray? The solution seems so simple, and yet anything but easy.
Eventually. We have all the time in the world, Frank says. His mind is bright and hopeful with possibility.
Gerard watches Mikey sleep, watches the even movements of his chest as he breathes. One day, Mikey will have no more need for breath. One day, they will share the same blood again.
One day.
“We're going to need a bigger bed,” Gerard whispers, and Frank can't contain his laughter.
The End.
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