hope is the thing with feathers

green @ 2026-03-01T11:57:00

2026-03-01T17:58:24Z

working on a new book. today I rewrote my opening. it's better now, I think? still not saying exactly what I want it to, but it's better.

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green @ 2025-12-16T17:47:00

2025-12-16T23:57:53Z

I was all geared up to talk about The Game Awards, but now I'm mostly meh. I don't have anything new or exciting to say about it. Like with the actual awards? I'm not one of the cynics. I don't think E33 should have won fewer awards. It's just that good.

As for the announcements, I'm most excited about Exodus and the KOTOR follow-up, Fate of the Old Republic. Which I know won't be around for a few more years, since it was more of an announcement for hiring and funding use (and to get us RPG fans fired up wayyy ahead of time). Not at all impressed with the 'big reveal' they saved until last. A live-service hero shooter? THAT'S your biggest announcement? Yeah, fuck that.

I haven't yet played the new 'Thank You' DLC for E33 yet since I um. Started a new game? I can't help myself! Also hoping to play Dispatch soon. And I picked up Control from PS+.

I have about 2k of my epilogue/sequel to my FTH fic and I really hope I can finish it in time for the FTH deadline. If I don't, my recipient has already said it's okay but still. I was HOPING.

The new antidepressant is still working well! The only thing against it is the joint pain. I've got a pretty bad elbow out of it. But I'm used to pain so I'll take that if it means less to no depression.

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green @ 2023-08-11T08:22:00

2023-08-11T13:24:16Z

so TECHNICALLY I have finished my first novel-length book. it doesn't feel done though. I have a lot of editing to do. but I did, in fact, write a book.

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green @ 2023-07-24T08:35:00

2023-07-24T13:39:36Z

just passed 50k on my book last night, whee! It's coming along nicely. FINALLY. and today I introduced one of the main characters for the next book in the series(!). :D :D :D

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green @ 2022-11-10T06:48:00

2022-11-10T12:50:30Z

It's NaNo month and I still haven't cracked 10k words. It's... pretty pathetic. But I'm rewriting a book I wrote earlier this year, and it's slow going because it's kinda boring, tbh. I'm changing it from third person to first, with alternating POV, but the story itself is already written. It's boring to do this. I'm a pantser at heart, and I'm so, so bored with already knowing where the story goes.

Does anyone have any advice on keeping my story feeling fresh as I rewrite? Or keeping me sane and interested?

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I've written some more book words

2021-05-22T13:05:45Z

That's right, it's over 9k now. It's coming along. It's not amazing but it'll get there eventually.

I can TOTALLY write M/M werewolf romance in 3rd person present tense, right?

Writing this book means I'm slacking off on fics. ones with deadlines. I was a bit ahead on them, so I can afford to write original for a bit and then try to pick the fics back up later, but I feel like the book words are more important to me right now than the fic words. Not because fic is less important in general but because I so rarely have the brain capacity + writing mojo for original stuff, and I need to ride this wave while I can.

A while back (year, two years? time is iffy these days), I saw someone in my circle talking about being a writing coach/professional cheerleader. Who was that? I really don't remember but I'd like to connect. Please and thank you. (Even if it's not you and you're interested, HMU - I'm broke AF but we can work something out maybe)

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green @ 2021-05-17T11:14:00

2021-05-17T16:20:48Z

gosh, words are so hard sometimes

sometimes I stare at blank docs

for entire days

and sometimes I write and it's work but the words do come

and sometimes I can just put the words down, one after the other, and it's so great.

yesterday and today have been great, but ugh. the days before

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green @ 2021-01-22T17:29:00

2021-01-22T23:31:24Z

whyyyyy is original fiction so fucking hard for me whyyyyyyyyyy

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green @ 2020-10-24T06:35:00

2020-10-24T11:50:58Z

good news for a change:

I met my GYWO goal for the year! 150k, done and dusted. It was a revamped goal since my first was 200k but the dumpster fire that is 2020 happened.

I'm not sure if I'm gonna try Nano this year or not. Probably I will just write as much as I can and forget the 50k target.

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getting back to it...

2020-08-28T15:03:03Z

Look at that, I'm writing a novel! I'm stoked.

This is the same novel I started writing in December and scrapped around February. It had some plot holes, or rather, some things that just didn't make sense. It took until now to rework my plot and outline, reconfigure some basic character things, and finally come up with a story that (so far) works in my head and on paper. So here I am, back at it.

If you're curious, it's M/M paranormal romance. Psychics! Mediums! ~~Daddy issues!~~

For a while, I felt like talking about my original fiction attempts might jinx me, but I'm feeling a little more confident now.

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green @ 2020-05-27T09:30:00

2020-05-27T14:36:11Z

This pandemic bullshit has really affected me creatively but I'm clawing my way back. I had a productive chat with a friend about my book yesterday, and today I wrote 1175 words of my FTH Sterek fic.

Mom broke her toe and refuses to stay off it. She keeps *doing* things. At this rate, it will never heal.

edit: I almost forgot. I'm cleaning my room. it's gonna be a huge endeavor so wish me luck. so far I've thrown away 2 garbage bags worth of stuff and filled 3 large boxes full of clothes for the thrift shop. I bought a new rug to keep me motivated.

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writing process questions from getyourwordsout

2020-02-14T10:39:03Z

1. Do you write your first draft by hand, or digitally?
Digitally for sure. I don't have the patience for longhand and I never learned shorthand.

( the rest under the cut )

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green @ 2019-10-24T11:23:00

2019-10-24T16:26:11Z

I wrote about 600 words of Guardian fic yesterday, so yay for that. It mostly needs to be rewritten, but I haven't written any Guardian fic in months so I'm still feeling pretty good about it.

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exciting coffeemaker update!

2019-06-07T20:58:31Z

I heard back from the post office. They misdelivered the package, and were unable to recover it! So then I went on Amazon's customer service chat and within maybe 5 minutes it was fixed - they are sending me a new coffeemaker. I should get it on Sunday.

Isn't that EXCITING?

:D

(now if only I could talk to insurance companies via chat I would be SET)

In other news, I totally finished my Steter Reverse Bang fic, and my posting date is the 12th. So if you want to read some dark fic with ~~tentacles~~ tendrils, be on the lookout for it then.

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green @ 2019-06-05T07:37:00

2019-06-05T12:40:15Z

I am writing my Steter Reverse Bang! My posting date is June 12th, but I'm sure it'll be done in time. :D

Last night I wrote 1250 words on it, and this morning I wrote 821. I'm on fire! \o/

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green @ 2019-05-31T21:43:00

2019-06-01T02:52:43Z

in April I wrote 7,386 words
in May I wrote a whopping 31,871 words!
so I totally made up for under-performing in April.

*dances*

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green @ 2019-05-31T06:30:00

2019-05-31T11:36:58Z

yesterday I wrote 1500 words of the Steter Reverse Bang fic I thought I wouldn't write. Mal calls it erotic horror. If I can figure out where it is going and then get it there in about 3k words, I'll be golden. Will that happen? PROBABLY NOT.

this morning I wrote 500+ words of the Guardian twin telepathy fic I started the other day. no idea where it's going.

and now I need to get Meg up for the day. and once she's gone, I'm gonna try to watch Good Omens. :D I've been looking forward to it SO BAD, but I'm TIRED AF and easily distracted.

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green @ 2019-05-29T14:11:00

2019-05-29T19:42:55Z

writing. hmm. yesterday I wrote a total of 680 words, about half on a Guardian fic and half on my Steter fic. and today I kinda glared at those projects and started something completely new.

Bee is in fucking Austria for a week and can't be my ~~constant enabler~~ cheerleader. This might lead to me deleting what I call 'excessive pining', which Bee usually saves.

I messed around with my vid software today. I haven't tried vidding in so long that I forgot what to do. It's coming back slowly.

The stetermonthlyprompt for June is Eclipse. Maybe I'll do something and maybe I won't. Probably not, but it's more likely to jolt something loose than May's prompt.

And it's almost time for the Steter Reverse Bang deadline. I did not manage to finish writing the thing for my thing. No one liked my playlist, or they didn't want to write something dark, so it got passed over by all the pinch hitters. This is disappointing. I did start something for it, and maybe I'll post what I have. Idk.

( boring non-fannish stuff )

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green @ 2019-05-25T16:08:00

2019-05-25T21:15:35Z

This morning I posted Welcome to the Fire, Zhao Yunlan's POV of what I'm lovingly calling drunk night.

And today I wrote about 1280 words of Shen Wei's POV of drunk night, moving into the morning after. Shen Wei is ridiculous, he really is. I love him to pieces but he can be an idiot. Pining! Misunderstandings! EEEEEE! I showed what I wrote to Bee, wondering if maybe there's TOO MUCH pining. Her response was like, "There's only too little pining or the correct amount of pining. There is no such thing as too much pining."

WHAT CAN YOU DO

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green @ 2019-05-23T20:36:00

2019-05-24T01:50:05Z

this morning I got up super early and started work on my Steter auction fic. I got 1700 words! I'm excited about this one, because I've never written a mobster AU before, and this has the Hales as a (totally unrealistic) crime family. :D?

also today, I edited the hell out of the next installment in my Only Love series. it just needs a title and I can post it.

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green @ 2019-05-20T07:28:00

2019-05-20T12:46:56Z

I finished my Sterek auction fic, and am now just awaiting beta. I don't know how happy I am with the fic. It was supposed to be 10-15k and ended up a little over 20k, but to me it still feels rushed. I could probably have written 10k more of it to develop the relationship some more, but NOPE, not doing it.

Now majoline is going to suggest I change all my comma placement, and I'm going to ignore half of the suggestions because my style relies on misuse of commas and a lack thereof. :P Hopefully I caught all the plot holes and repeated words/phrases and stuff like that on my own.

So now I need to start my second (and last) auction fic, which will be Steter. I have a basic idea of what I'm doing, but I don't have a solid plot yet. I have the scenario but not the structure.

And then once I'm done with that last auction fic, I can be free of Teen Wolf and I can write all the Guardian fics I want! I have a plot bunny doc where I keep my ideas, adding to it as I come up with new things, and I have so many ideas already! I wish I had more straightforward Weilan ideas, though. I guess you can't help what your id comes up with. Unless...

...maybe Ye Zun is mind controlling me to get me to write him some more happy endings?

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writing update

2019-05-15T14:50:54Z

This morning I wrote 1320 words of my Fandom Trumps Hate auction fic. just two more scenes to go! the biggest obstacle is the smut, which I need to be really feeling for it to work, and I'm not feeling it. I'm so bored with Teen Wolf, but I've got this one and then I've got ANOTHER auction fic to write, and THENnnnn I can say bye-bye to the fandom. (I also have a shortish fic to MAYBE write by May 31st for the Steter Reverse Bang, but so far I only have 700 words of it and it may not happen.)

Last night I finished the 2nd fic in my Ye Zun series (I've decided it's a series). It needs to sit a bit before I edit and then I think I'm going to write #3 before I post #2. The 3rd fic is going to be Zhao Yunlan's POV. I think. There's just so much PINING. Poor Ye Zun, he's been pining for Shen Wei for years and NOW he's sorta pining over Zhao Yunlan TOO. It's all very heartachey. :D

I really love pining.

I am SO STOKED for the Guardian 520 Exchange to go live! IS IT MAY 20th YET?????

(OHHH and I just installed new vidding software. So. There's THAT.)

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green @ 2019-05-02T12:26:00

2019-05-02T17:45:44Z

my writing mojo is BACK. I managed to write 1200 words so far today for the current fan_flashworks challenge. *dances* I'm still writing Ye Zun and Shen Wei as children, now with an extra darker edge since... well. You'll see once I finish.

I swear I'll write some Weilan one of these days. I do have that vampire!ZYL fic to finish, after all.

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fannish update

2019-04-28T18:32:28Z

My writing output is kaput. Even if I manage to write something, it's not really postable or salvageable. I think I'll just keep calling them writing exercises. Yesterday I wrote about 500 words of Zhao Yunlan [redacted for spoilerish reasons] (Because apparently, this is how I roll.) The main idea will probably make its way into a fic at some point but the writing itself is just... words.

I've only written 7k this month. But I think it's down to me needing to get to know how to write these new characters, so it doesn't come as easily as, say, characters I've spent years with. I can't just bang out 15k word fics at this point like I'm used to. But I'll get there. I just need to keep working at it.

The vampire!ZYL fic needs a lot of editing but it's getting there. Maybe I'll be able to finish it up and edit and have it up in a week or two. For now, eh. We'll see what happens.

I'm happy to gush and cheerlead for others, though.

I put a couple of pictures up in the Guardian wiki, which I am SO excited about. The only wiki I've ever contributed to before is Fanlore, and only a few things there if I include my own page. I look forward to contributing what I can to the Guardian wiki, though. I love fan projects, and at least a wiki doesn't require me to make a big commitment - I can do what I can when I can, and that's all I have to do.

I've seen 8 episodes of Detective L now and I'm just so happy with it. It's such fun fluff.

I need to work on my thingy for the Guardian exchange. I'm not happy with it so far, but I'll get there.

OH and before I forget, because no_detective's Weilan playlist got under my skin, I made an edit. It's here on Tumblr -- spoilers for ep 38-39 of Guardian.

( also here under the cut )

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green @ 2017-06-14T10:41:00

2017-06-14T15:46:14Z

I finally had an appointment with the ortho clinic! I was three minutes late for it, but I made it!

...and then I was informed my provider had a family emergency and so I'd need to make a new appointment.

At this rate, my back is never getting fixed. :P

New appointment is for the 26th. If anyone's keeping track.

***

I'm writing so much lately! Monday I wrote 3k words. THREE THOUSAND. How awesome is that?

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