You need to do the conversion in connection with the Jewish community you want to join. The Reform and Conservative movements each have relatively systematic approaches to conversion, though I don't think Conservative Jews recognize Reform conversions (and Orthodox Jews don't recognize either, though both are valid from the perspective of the Israeli Law of Return and I can explain that paradox if you really want to know!) Both the Reform and Conservative movements have guides to conversion--books they want you to read, how many hours of instruction you should have and what you should know, stuff they want you to commit to, and a ritual involving a religious court of three observant Jews (usually rabbis, though not always) from their movement and a ritual bath or mikveh.

The only way to become a Jew is in relation to a community of people who recognize the authority of the beit din (religious court) who does the ritual with you and who believe that you do X,Y,Z to join the Jewish people. There will always be someone who doesn't approve of the way you did it, because that's the craziness you get into when you pursue Judaism.

I don't think that not asking for money makes the rabbi more legit, necessarily. Where would you do the beit din and mikveh? In Israel? Does this rabbi have a congregation? This post made me realize what a vulnerable situation you're in, so far away from a Jewish community.